Everyone knows about Rich ‘nutsinho’ Lyndaker’s poker prowess. At age 24, he has accumulated over $1,000,000 profit from crushing high stakes cash games on PokerStars. On top of that, nutsinho collected $500,000 for his runner-up finish in a 2008 WSOP event. Did you know nutsinho could rap?

Some rappers produce their finest work in a lab, with a pen and a pad, but nutsinho drops lyrical awesomeness straight into the PokerStars chat box:

nutsinho: ” smokin #27.. take me to heaven but my boy stuck on eleven sup wit day ? im strapped with a mack 10 n a extra gat, thats a fact iima no limit soldier, ya gonna fold ya hand when i triple barrel. cause u give credit im not sorel. got the 140 stack

In this clever rhyme, nutsinho reveals that he smokes cigarettes and carries an automatic weapon. “Smokin #27” refers to the cheap Blend No. 27 cigarettes manufactured by Marlboro. Being “strapped with a mack 10” simply means he has a compact machine pistol holstered somewhere on his body. Nutsinho continues and states that he is a “no limit soldier”, conveying that he quite dedicated to being successful at No Limit Hold ‘Em. Nutisnho has a strong finish, “ya gonna hold ya hand when I triple barrel” is genius and really ties together the soldier and gun imagery. He alludes to Sorel Mizzi’s tendency to bluff when he writes “cause you give credit im not sorel”. Mizzi is an accomplished Canadian poker pro better known as Imper1um.


nutsinho: “kid pokes on a heater he goin round for round w btches…wifebeater, but rollin round town in a covertible, 2 seater, playing lagg like eastgate..peter…never peter out, team pokerstars pro got all the clout, u aint read the bible, kidpoker devout
prayinn to da poker gods so he can hit 2 out”

Nutsinho transitions to a rather sardonic tone, ridiculing Daniel Negreanu. He questions Negreanu’s cash game abilities when he states “kid pokes on heater”. A heater in poker is a temporary period of time when a player defies variance and gets lucky again and again. Nutsinho takes a shot at Peter Eastgate, who recently announced his retirement from poker, “playing lagg like eastgate..peter…never peter out”. Nutsinho acknowledges the power of Team PokerStars Pro, stating they “got all the clout”, and communicates that Negreanu is dedicated to PokerStars and poker in general, “kidpoker devout”.

nutsinho: ” im always winning, my rims always spinning, im always sinning, go yo girl always squinting, money always printing, nutsinho TM just minting, altrum altus just so fly, bart 1 sexy guy, pquest ? why? jcl from down under hes a real guy, sethseth..hi shoutout to bronxbomba aka twoshae,cant spit himself cause hes too gay, 19 yrs old and wear a toupee, sad tale, on the rail, banned from 2p2 since may

Nutsinho continues to brag and gets personal with the reader. He affirms he is “always winning” and that his “rims always spinning.” Rims are the visible part of the car wheel that many see as a status symbol. Rims increase exponentially in value for every inch above a 20″ radius. Nutsinho either alludes to the epicanthic fold associated with the eyes of East Asians or how his balling out of control surprises females when he says “go yo girl always squinting”. His rhyme persists as he continues to boast, “money always printing,nutsinho TM just minting”. Nutsinho concludes by addressing players personally.  He calls “bart 1 sexy guy”, perhaps referring to Bart Hanson, a poker player and commentator.

Players can learn, rap, and play with nutsinho at PokerStars. He frequently sits in Daniel’s Room where observer chat is always on.

Update: Nutsinho says he could rap even better if he was not suffering the debilitating effects of alcohol. We look forward to covering his next rap chronicles.