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dude be happy you have the BRM discipline to move down. I know moving down always sucks, but I've had to do it more times than I can count, and it's the only thing that stops me from spewing off tons of my roll. First time I moved up to 100NL, I had to drop 3 times before it stuck.
You seem to have massive issues with mental discipline in game -- it's pretty much impossible to win with those so work on those. meditate, exercise, eliminate distractions, get lots of sleep, take vitamins, jerk off, whatever just find something that works for you because if you can't deal with those, it doesn't matter how good you are.
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