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Apologys for offence this was me when I was alcoholik

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  1. #1
    Kpederson Guest

    Default Apologys for offence this was me when I was alcoholik

    I posted this exacctly a year ago at anuther forum I used to go to, I was a bad alcoholiuc at the time/
    Imma need to get this out of my system. apology is it offendds


    ok, thiss is totaly cool to me but also weird why i didnt get it up. After imma got off work tonite went too the bar. Bought bout 4 rounds of shots and bout 6 beers for others which total cost me almost $120. I have a biker friend who was gonna go home and then when they were leaving his wife says :you gonna drive him home later? well, hes a friend and he's funny when he gets drunk so I went along and said yes. We drank for awhile and I danced with a few chicks who I was tryin to get into pants situation and one ended up puking so they both ended up being a no go. So i take friend home and his wife calls on the way. We show up at the house and he asks if i want a shot before i go. I say sure and we get up to the door and open the door and his wife is topless and starts kissing him and grabbing towrads my shlong. im thinking wtf and he says go with it. So im like, fcuk an a man. I start grabbin tits and next thing i know, bedroom. I say, im cool with this as long as no guy touches guy or dick touches dick. glad they understood. Well, his wife is blowing me and she is the best blow ive ever had. But........it goes down for some reason. Im laying on the bed while my friend is behind her going away and she is still going at it. I tried to think of Jenna jameson and brianna banks and everything. I started grabbing her hair and she got hot off it but still nothing with my wang. Dont get me wrong, shes only 10 yrs older and she is fcuking hot. I m thinking the shots got to me and i got whisker dick. I played along till buddy did his deal and apologized about 100 times. I still feel bad. I wanted ta nut and i think she woulda fullfeild my dream of a money shot. Was it the fact it was my buddy and his wife or the fact is was the shots? BTW, i got off work at 11:30pm and drank like a fish till 1:30(about 5 shots, 5 beers and some teasors of red snappers, 3 of em.) What the fcuk did i do wrong and how to fix em next time cause buddy said if right situation happened again then im in again.
  2. #2
    hahaha
  3. #3
    worst thread ever
  4. #4
    nutsinho's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Warpe
    best thread ever
    omfg
    My bankroll is the amount of money I would spend or lose before I got a job. It is calculated by adding my net worth to whatever I can borrow.
  5. #5
    Kpederson Guest
    Imma sorry guys but my mentor at AA told me I had to get humilated beofore i could recover.
    I was such a jackass bacj then, and it was the drink which brought me my downfallin.
    And my wife spending all my monney on clothes and chit for the house.
  6. #6
    mrhappy333's Avatar
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    This is standard, no reason to be humiliated over this. I say stand up and be proud.
    Maybe he said you need to be humble?
    3 3 3 I'm only half evil.
  7. #7
    MMF is so not cool irl...
    You-- yes, you-- you're a cunt.
  8. #8
    nutsinho's Avatar
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    Default Re: Apologys for offence this was me when I was alcoholik

    but boost,

    Quote Originally Posted by Kpederson
    I danced with a few chicks who I was tryin to get into pants situation and one ended up puking so they both ended up being a no go

    and


    shes only 10 yrs older and she is fcuking hot
    My bankroll is the amount of money I would spend or lose before I got a job. It is calculated by adding my net worth to whatever I can borrow.
  9. #9
    mrhappy333's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by boostNslide
    MMF is so cool irl...
    fyp

    You never banged some chic with your buddy? It's brilliant.
    3 3 3 I'm only half evil.
  10. #10
    Quote Originally Posted by mrhappy333
    Quote Originally Posted by boostNslide
    MMF is so cool irl...
    fyp

    You never banged some chic with your buddy? It's brilliant.
    as long as the balls don't touch and there's no eye contact, no problem
  11. #11
    swiggidy's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by boostNslide
    MMF is so not cool irl...
    I'm with boost
    (\__/)
    (='.'=)
    (")_(")
  12. #12
    mrhappy333's Avatar
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    hmmm, have to run a poll?
    3 3 3 I'm only half evil.
  13. #13
    the only enjoyment i'd get out of MMF is murdering the other M.
  14. #14
    mrhappy333's Avatar
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    woops, double post.
    3 3 3 I'm only half evil.
  15. #15
    Keep a tab of Viagra handy for next time. Situation solved.
  16. #16
    I'll give ya some advice that my Grandfather used to give me:

    Boy, whenever you're with a women and ya get whiskey dick, go into the bathroom, lay your dick on the toilet and slam the seat down on that bitch. If that won't wake it up, nothing will.

    In all honesty, this is one of the best posts I've read in a while.
  17. #17
    Anyone who does an MMF has never been involved in a MFF, guaranteed. That shit is like crack once you've had girls doin shit in your bed with each other and you, You'll never want another dick in your bed. No matter how hot she is. It's wrong. Seriously, You will end up putting your lips or dick somewhere another dick has been within the last few minutes. IT"S WRONG!
  18. #18
    Galapogos's Avatar
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    MMF is NOT cool. Unless one is in front getting oral and one is giving it to her from behind and you're both giving each other high fives.


    Quote Originally Posted by sauce123
    I don't get why you insist on stacking off with like jack high all the time.
  19. #19
    whatever floats your boat, its just not my thing.
    You-- yes, you-- you're a cunt.
  20. #20
    Quote Originally Posted by mrhappy333
    hmmm, have to run a poll?
    Please add an option of M to said poll as that is all that I get and therefore is the best.
    If you wanna turn your daddy parts ORANGE eat some cheetos and watch some porn!

    Currently sucking at life!
  21. #21
    Miffed22001's Avatar
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    two guys banging one chick = +++Ev.

    two chicks getting bange by one guy= ++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++ +++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++EV.
  22. #22
    I dont understand how two guys with one girl can be more +ev than only you and one girl...
  23. #23
    Quote Originally Posted by Galopogus
    Unless one is in front getting oral and one is giving it to her from behind and you're both giving each other high fives.
    Maybe if you stay at your own end and never turn her around. And if she's suckin my dick, it better be his wife. Not mine suckin his, I need to kiss her good bye in the morning when she gets on the train.

    I dont understand how two guys with one girl can be more +ev than only you and one girl...
    I think it's more of the, "two guys and one chick is more EV than no chick at all" would be the thinking, But I disagree with that as well.
  24. #24
    Quote Originally Posted by dsmrolla06
    I dont understand how two guys with one girl can be more +ev than only you and one girl...
    if it's his girl...
  25. #25
    Quote Originally Posted by Trainer_jyms
    I think it's more of the, "two guys and one chick is more EV than no chick at all" would be the thinking, But I disagree with that as well.
    If thats the case, the girl must be above the normal standards, not just some lagune creature.
  26. #26
    Quote Originally Posted by Miffed22001
    two guys banging one chick = +++Ev.

    .
    im thinking this is only marginally +EV...

    yea there's a chick there but what if me and the guy cross swords or he starts massaging my balls ...meh
  27. #27
    swiggidy's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by MiJ
    yea there's a chick there but what if me and the guy cross swords or he starts massaging my balls ...meh
    Or he looks at you and winks...
    (\__/)
    (='.'=)
    (")_(")
  28. #28
    euphoricism's Avatar
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    To participate in a MMF, I'd have to be pretty close to the other guy, but pretty far apart physically, yakno? I could see doing a MMF with like your best buddy youve known since you were 10. And yeah, I'd still avoid the crossing swords ;p
    <Staxalax> Honestly, #flopturnriver is the one thing that has improved my game the most.
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  29. #29

    Default Re: Apologys for offence this was me when I was alcoholik

    Quote Originally Posted by Kpederson
    I posted this exacctly a year ago at anuther forum I used to go to, I was a bad alcoholiuc at the time/
    Imma need to get this out of my system. apology is it offendds


    ok, thiss is totaly cool to me but also weird why i didnt get it up. After imma got off work tonite went too the bar. Bought bout 4 rounds of shots and bout 6 beers for others which total cost me almost $120. I have a biker friend who was gonna go home and then when they were leaving his wife says :you gonna drive him home later? well, hes a friend and he's funny when he gets drunk so I went along and said yes. We drank for awhile and I danced with a few chicks who I was tryin to get into pants situation and one ended up puking so they both ended up being a no go. So i take friend home and his wife calls on the way. We show up at the house and he asks if i want a shot before i go. I say sure and we get up to the door and open the door and his wife is topless and starts kissing him and grabbing towrads my shlong. im thinking wtf and he says go with it. So im like, fcuk an a man. I start grabbin tits and next thing i know, bedroom. I say, im cool with this as long as no guy touches guy or dick touches dick. glad they understood. Well, his wife is blowing me and she is the best blow ive ever had. But........it goes down for some reason. Im laying on the bed while my friend is behind her going away and she is still going at it. I tried to think of Jenna jameson and brianna banks and everything. I started grabbing her hair and she got hot off it but still nothing with my wang. Dont get me wrong, shes only 10 yrs older and she is fcuking hot. I m thinking the shots got to me and i got whisker dick. I played along till buddy did his deal and apologized about 100 times. I still feel bad. I wanted ta nut and i think she woulda fullfeild my dream of a money shot. Was it the fact it was my buddy and his wife or the fact is was the shots? BTW, i got off work at 11:30pm and drank like a fish till 1:30(about 5 shots, 5 beers and some teasors of red snappers, 3 of em.) What the fcuk did i do wrong and how to fix em next time cause buddy said if right situation happened again then im in again.
    it wasn't you who posted this before - you didn't say Immmaa
  30. #30
    bigred's Avatar
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    MMM FTW?
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  31. #31
    Galapogos's Avatar
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    Phew! I was starting to get worried. It was taking a while for Bigred to chime in. I figured this thread would be under his surveilance from the start.

    Were you busy babysitting Lukie's girlfriend or something?


    Quote Originally Posted by sauce123
    I don't get why you insist on stacking off with like jack high all the time.
  32. #32
    mrhappy333's Avatar
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    Default Re: Apologys for offence this was me when I was alcoholik

    Quote Originally Posted by Kpederson
    he asks if i want a shot before i go. I say sure and we get up to the door and open the door and his wife is topless and starts kissing him and grabbing towrads my shlong. im thinking wtf and he says go with it. So im like, fcuk an a man. I start grabbin tits and next thing i know, bedroom. I say, im cool with this as long as no guy touches guy or dick touches dick
    See, this is the perfect MMF situation.
    You know he wants to bang his buddies wife
    and he probly would if he buddy was passed out on the floor...........so now that his buddy says it's cool, His buddy won't be pissed when he's talkin about how he fckuded his wife later next week when there at the bar again.
    Then next time when he and his buddy are at the bar and Kped gets shot down, he's got plan B all set. He gets his friend a little drunk, takes him home, and gets laid anyway.
    amirite.
    3 3 3 I'm only half evil.
  33. #33
    there is nothing funnier than intensely sucking on a left tittie for a minute and looking to your right to see your good bud doing the same to the other. it's seriously fucking hilarious and i never stop laughing about it, 8 years later.

    p.s. the left one is usually bigger, so keep that in mind when flipping coins for sides.
    In answer to your question... it depends...
    alias2211.com poker
  34. #34
    Pay4myCad!!'s Avatar
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    !!

    As long as u, or any other parties involved, don't turn out to be the stanky chick from
    http://www.flopturnriver.com/phpBB2/...oker-45269.htm
    How do you tell a woman ... ...... ......?, mrhappys post, things are going to be ok. Otherwise, it's back to the Jerry Springer show.

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    This is some funny poo tho!!
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  35. #35
    bigred's Avatar
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    die u fgt lololol
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  36. #36
    Check this dumb shit out. I used to work with two dudes who caught this German slut at a club and took her home. I guess they MMF'd her pretty good. So Monday at work, one of them was telling everyone about it, except he kept calling it a "threesome." The other dude kept trying to keep it on the hush, but it just didn't work. The worst part was when "threesome" guy told us that he could feel "keep it on the hush" guy breathing on him. Maybe you had to be there, but this blew the lid off the unintentional comedy scale.
    There's three types of people in the world...those who can count, and those who can't.
  37. #37
    bigred's Avatar
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    I wouldn't want a wife who wants MMF. Well, I wouldn't want MMF either.
    LOL OPERATIONS
  38. #38
    Quote Originally Posted by bigred
    I wouldn't want a wife who wants MMF. Well, I wouldn't want MMF either.
    yah... umm.. that cant go good.

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