Quote Originally Posted by zook
I did a lot of stupid shit growing up and I'd like to think that, unlike so many parents, I'll be tolerant and understanding of my kids when they start doing their own stupid shit. But part of me fears that I'll become an old curmudgeon like so many other fathers. Thoughts?

I also like to think that I'll be open and honest with kids about topics my parents weren't, like alcohol, drugs and sex. Thoughts?
I've seen parents from both ends of the spectrum - from super strict to totally lenient and indulgent - and I think the best kids come homes that tend toward the strict end. My parents were great and I think I parent(ed) a lot like them, although I made more effort to communicate with my kids than my dad did. I was definitely more open about substance abuse and sex.

Lenient, indulgent parents drive me crazy, cause I absolutely can't stand spoiled brats and that's the kind of kids they tend to produce. I've seen 'cool' parents, too, ones that let their 14 year olds smoke and drink in the house, "because they'll just be doing it somewhere else", and I think that's nuts. Blow a reefer with your kid while you're at it. Oh yeah, seen that too.

It's totally hypocritical because I did all of those things as a teenager, but I grew up and wanted my kids to be safe and healthy, so I had no problem with it. PLUS I knew all the tricks, so there wasn't much that got by me.

Condoning behavior that you don't want your kid to indulge in just encourages more of it.

You can still be friends with your children, but you need to be a parent first.