Fold or Crumple?

[BooG690]

The age-old question.

[yourfather]

What are we folding or crumpling?

[flomo]

tp or cash?

[bigred]

pizza?

[BooG690]

[bigred]

Who the fuck folds?

[givememyleg]

i do a combo, i fold then crumble

[givememyleg]

also, f all you standers

[JKDS]

also, f all you standers

Poop you, buddy

[JKDS]

and obv fold so that its a lil' poofy.

[Warpe]

i do a combo, i fold then crumble

third poll option pls

[Halv]

Fold obv.

[XTR1000]

easy fold

[BooG690]

I seriously don't understand how people sit down and wipe...but that's a whole different poll.

Folding ftw.

[Hawk]

This thread is such a typical sequel. the first one was great (after all, who the fuck ever would have pictured a standing wiper?!??!?), and since that was so good, another one about wiping options would be great too right? NO!!

Coming next, Toilet Habits 3 - Pants around the ankles or knees???

That said, fold, you cant have any surprise holes in the middle of your TP.

edit 1:And since when can't I fucking say fuck and not have it altered to poop?

edit 2: ok...first fuck is now poop, other fucks are still fuck....wtf.

[BooG690]

Play poker while you poop!

[kiwiMark]

Play poker while you poop!

FYP.

And fold, every time. You people would never be allowed to wipe mine.

[bigred]

wow, this thread is just as enlightening as the stand or sit. Maybe I should try this "fold" thing.

[boost]

how can you crumple? With equal amounts of paper youre making such a high variance play with no benefits in sight except saving a second or two.

also fold + splash with a lil warm water from the sink is the win. I mean srsly.. sometimes dry paper just isnt gonna cut it..

[BooG690]

also fold + splash with a lil warm water from the sink is the win. I mean srsly.. sometimes dry paper just isnt gonna cut it..

Last thing I want is a soaking wet asshole...though baby wipes are marvelous.

[boost]

baby wipes are truly amazing. But they are not always on hand. And srsly, sometimes you just arent getting the job done with dry paper.

[bigred]

I'm really excited to poop now...Come on subway sandwich, digest!

[kiwiMark]

Dranger crumples then wipes three times before releasing, pass it on.

[BennyLaRue]

I seriously don't understand how people sit down and wipe...

It's because MY ASS ISN'T BIGGER THAN THE BOWL.

Fold, imo.

[BooG690]

Dranger crumples then wipes three times before releasing, pass it on.

No, really, it's true:

<dranger> ive gotten 3 wipes out of one piece imo
<dranger> by scrunching
<BooG> u crumple AND reuse?
<+kiwiMark> 3?!
<BooG> you're fucking gross
<+kiwiMark> Yeah I'm so confused

[spoonitnow]

Michelle folds in a very specific way every single time. I crumple.

[bigred]

Michelle folds in a very specific way every single time. I crumple.

So Michelle is a dude? We all know women only #1

[chardrian]

yeah 3 wipes per 2 sheets is standard.

wipe, fold, wipe, fold, wipe, drop.

I never understood why when we have guests tp just seems to disappear - I guess it's cuz most of you are tp wasters who wipe and drop.

[bigred]

3 hours later...still don't have to poop

[sarbox68]

yeah 3 wipes per 2 sheets is standard.

wipe, fold, wipe, fold, wipe, drop.

I never understood why when we have guests tp just seems to disappear - I guess it's cuz most of you are tp wasters who wipe and drop.

F-kin guests... 2 sheets becomes 6 and 3 wipes becomes 1. The math says it all...

[JKDS]

I DONT WIPE MY SHIT WITH SHIT KTHX

[stonyman]

was a standing crumpler have since switched it up to sitting folder

[spoonitnow]

Michelle folds in a very specific way every single time. I crumple.

So Michelle is a dude? We all know women only #1

Women wipe after peeing too.

[bigred]

Michelle folds in a very specific way every single time. I crumple.

So Michelle is a dude? We all know women only #1

Women wipe after peeing too.

Touche

[boost]

chard.. 2 sheets, really? How do you get 3 wipes out of 2 sheets? I feel like all paper, even the best of quality, needs to be fold on itself at least once. So now we have 1 sheet size doubled up, if we fold this in half I can see getting another wipe, but we cant fold again. We cant get a wipe with 1/4 sheet size.. srsly youre getting fecal matter under your finger nails doing this.

[kiwiMark]

Michelle folds in a very specific way every single time. I crumple.

So Michelle is a dude? We all know women only #1

Uh, what. Women don't do either, yuck. And they definitely don't shake after peeing.

was a standing crumpler have since switched it up to sitting folder

Welcome, Brother.

[dsmrolla06]

Meh standing crumpler. Its the only way to go to avoid any and all accidents. I sure as hell am not going to stick my hand into the bowl while im sitting on it after just shitting. And crumpling may waste more toilet paper, but you definitely dont have to worry about break through with your fingers by crumpling. You always have enough cushion for that.

[boost]

if you have enough cushion then youre using like 3x as much paper, at least. Global warming is your anus' fault.

[BooG690]

yeah 3 wipes per 2 sheets is standard.

wipe, fold, wipe, fold, wipe, drop.

I never understood why when we have guests tp just seems to disappear - I guess it's cuz most of you are tp wasters who wipe and drop.

Right...refolding and reusing is standard. But Dranger crumples and reuses. Ew.

[sarbox68]

chard.. 2 sheets, really? How do you get 3 wipes out of 2 sheets? I feel like all paper, even the best of quality, needs to be fold on itself at least once. So now we have 1 sheet size doubled up, if we fold this in half I can see getting another wipe, but we cant fold again. We cant get a wipe with 1/4 sheet size.. srsly youre getting fecal matter under your finger nails doing this.

Dude... I tried to follow those instructions and ended up with a f-ckin origami peacock....

[kiwiMark]

Meh standing crumpler. Its the only way to go to avoid any and all accidents. I sure as hell am not going to stick my hand into the bowl while im sitting on it after just shitting. And crumpling may waste more toilet paper, but you definitely dont have to worry about break through with your fingers by crumpling. You always have enough cushion for that.

Dude how high do you have the water? Or do you have like gorilla arms? When you crumple there's more risk of the finger breaking through, surely, 'cause the toilet-paper-buffer between finger and anus isn't evenly distributed...it just doesn't sound safe!
And what if it un-crumples as you pull away, now you've got shit on your cheeks.

[Ragnar4]

I pick the dingleberries out and crumple that shit into a ball with both hands.

[donkbee]

Dude how high do you have the water? Or do you have like gorilla arms? When you crumple there's more risk of the finger breaking through, surely, 'cause the toilet-paper-buffer between finger and anus isn't evenly distributed...it just doesn't sound safe! And what if it un-crumples as you pull away, now you've got shit on your cheeks.

this is one of the funniest posts i've ever read

[chardrian]

chard.. 2 sheets, really? How do you get 3 wipes out of 2 sheets? I feel like all paper, even the best of quality, needs to be fold on itself at least once. So now we have 1 sheet size doubled up, if we fold this in half I can see getting another wipe, but we cant fold again. We cant get a wipe with 1/4 sheet size.. srsly youre getting fecal matter under your finger nails doing this.

meh - I had to wipe my ass on a pretty frequent basis with newspaper when I was in the Peace Corps so 2 sheets of double ply is plenty thick for me. What I really want is a bidet - then those never ending wipes could be taken care of proper.

[kiwiMark]

That's actually me, when I was however old. Seems applicable.

[BennyLaRue]

That's actually me, when I was however old. Seems applicable.

1) You lived on a horror movie set? That house looks totally haunted. I can tell from the trimwork.

2) POLICE ALERT! sounds like an awesome game.

[Luco]

This thread has been an education for me.

I sit and fold, and had no idea that there was any other way to do it.

[BennyLaRue]

Buy Charmin Extra Strong. You'll use less, no breakage. Totally worth the extra money, imo. You'll be ballin in the bathroom...it's the Grey Goose of toilet paper.

I feel sorry for newspaper ass person. So itchy.

[kiwiMark]

That's actually me, when I was however old. Seems applicable.

1) You lived on a horror movie set? That house looks totally haunted. I can tell from the trimwork.

2) POLICE ALERT! sounds like an awesome game.

It's the BEST game ever.

"You spotted a suspicious gentleman walking next to your neighbour's car while your neighbour is on holiday and didn't call the police. MOVE BACK THREE SPACES."

[ProZachNation]

My method involves both.

A crumple then a fold.

[dsmrolla06]

Meh standing crumpler. Its the only way to go to avoid any and all accidents. I sure as hell am not going to stick my hand into the bowl while im sitting on it after just shitting. And crumpling may waste more toilet paper, but you definitely dont have to worry about break through with your fingers by crumpling. You always have enough cushion for that.

Dude how high do you have the water? Or do you have like gorilla arms? When you crumple there's more risk of the finger breaking through, surely, 'cause the toilet-paper-buffer between finger and anus isn't evenly distributed...it just doesn't sound safe!
And what if it un-crumples as you pull away, now you've got shit on your cheeks.

I just dont like the idea of sticking my hand between my ass that i just shit out of and water thats full of shit when theres at most what, 5 inches between? Also its way easier to break through a folded piece of paper thats folded than one thats crumpled up. It may waste more paper but you certainly dont have to worry about breaking through. And as for the un-crumpling, that doesnt happen. Youre holding it at more than one point the entire time. How often do you see a ball of paper just come un-crumpled?

[speedcake]

And as for the un-crumpling, that doesnt happen. Youre holding it at more than one point the entire time. How often do you see a ball of paper just come un-crumpled?

Sure, maybe 99% of the time it goes smoothly.

That 1% of the time that it does not go smoothly? Pretty shitty.

[dsmrolla06]

1% is definitely an overstatement. I cant remember a time its ever happened, otherwise I doubt I would still be a crumpler. i dont know maybe I was just never taught the proper way to wipe, I certainly cant remember being taught at least. With this high majority of folders, surely there was some kind of committee long ago that decided the proper way to wipe thy ass?

[kiwiMark]

^ OR common sense dictates folding

[BennyLaRue]

I admit I crumpled when I was 4. But no more.

[speedcake]

I don't care what the percentages are, if I only ever accidentally wiped my own shit all over my ass once that would be one too many.

Fold, my friend. Fold.

[dsmrolla06]

I don't care what the percentages are, if I only ever accidentally wiped my own shit all over my ass once that would be one too many.

Fold, my friend. Fold.

Its never happened, I run good.

[dranger7070]

Char and myself pwn this thread. BooG seems to forget I went to Marine Corps boot camp recently where they limit you to 3 rolls of TP for 8 stalls and 60+ other recruits. YOU GET AS MUCH WITH AS LITTLE AS POSSIBLE.

And spoon being a crumpler also makes me the winnar.

/thread