Posting after I've read the thread cos I want to say

1.

congrats on finding option C, vent on the internet about how fucking tempted you are to beat the shit out of some guy who already had absolutely nothing going for him in life, so that you release some of your rage online before he arrives and can be halfway civil to him IRL.

2.

He is planning a visit, and my wife has already agreed. I guess I'm kinda pissed that she would do that without really talking to me about it. But ultimately that's a separate issue
I see this as the key issue to be honest. I wouldn't be wasting time coming up with ways to improve or further destroy the relationship with brother, but try to get to a point with wiff that she understands your feelings on the subject. I'm not saying she cut off all ties with her family or with the brother, but inviting him to stay in a house the two of you share without checking with you first doesn't seem like it has to be happening. Assuming she knows the extent of how you feel.


3.

obv you're a troll account of spoon's, what's up buddy