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  1. #1
    PO$$E$$ED's Avatar
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    Default injuries sustained while playing poker

    I hear the poker software on my computer beeping so I rush into my room to play my hand. As I'm running into my room my left index toe makes contact with the corner of the door, cracking my nail and putting a nice gash into the tender skin under my nail. I hobble over to my computer to play my hand, smoke some dank, put some ice on my toe and figure I'm good.

    A few months later, I'm playing with the toe when I realize it's broken, and that it hasn't set yet. So Doctor PO$$E$$ED makes himself a cast out of a baseball card and avoids an uninsured visit to the hospital.

    What injuries have you sustained while playing poker?
  2. #2
    PO$$E$$ED's Avatar
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    btw, a chafed cock is not an injury
  3. #3
    chafed cock

    edit: nvm
  4. #4
    a500lbgorilla's Avatar
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    himself fucker.
    nothing, i stretch before playing.
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  5. #5
    samsonite2100's Avatar
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    Your loosing, lolololololololololol
    Does damaging your ego beyond repair count?
  6. #6
    Lukie's Avatar
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    possessed, as much as you make me cry, you actually crack me up sometimes.
  7. #7
    How about hemorrhoids, do they count? I started counting them after years of competitive powerlifting.
  8. #8
    at least they're toned
  9. #9
    PO$$E$$ED's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Rabid Dog
    How about hemorrhoids, do they count? I started counting them after years of competitive powerlifting.
    damn...
    good luck with that bro
    I would rather have all the toes on one feet broken than have hemorrhoids
  10. #10
    Quote Originally Posted by Warpe
    at least they're toned
    LOL
  11. #11
    Quote Originally Posted by PO$$E$$ED
    I would rather have all the toes on one feet broken than have hemorrhoids
    *bites tongue*
  12. #12
    Quote Originally Posted by Rabid Dog
    How about hemorrhoids, do they count? I started counting them after years of competitive powerlifting.
    Eh...
  13. #13
    I have broken just about every toe I have, Martial Arts, Soccer etc... No reason to go to hospital if its just a hairline. I usually don't even notice they are broken until I shower.

    Hmmm, injury during on-line poker -- heat burns from the laptop on my legs...

    Bruise on my head when my wife smacks it cause I have been playing too much
  14. #14
    I've suffered numerous bruises on my penis, after clicking my mouse with it.
  15. #15
    AHiltz's Avatar
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    I hurt the tendons in my right hand after losing a $200 stack at $100NL with AA vs J9o with it all going in preflop. I lost the hand, smashed my fist down on the desk and voila, instant pain for my dumb assed temper tantrum. Let it be a lesson to all.
  16. #16
    I "accidentally" kicked a hole in my wall once. That kinda hurt my foot.
  17. #17
    lolzzz_321's Avatar
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    Smashed my mouse, hand go cut up a little, just poured some 'tussin on it though.
  18. #18
    Gave a nice tug on my nuts after getting up and not noticitg that the laptop cable was tangled up in my groin area
    Against that heinous background, my crimes were pale and meaningless. I was a relatively respectable citizen - a multiple felon, perhaps, but certainly not dangerous.
  19. #19
    PO$$E$$ED's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Anon.E.Moose
    Gave a nice tug on my nuts after getting up and not noticitg that the laptop cable was tangled up in my groin area
    bwahahaha
  20. #20
    STIdrivr's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by AHiltz
    I hurt the tendons in my right hand after losing a $200 stack at $100NL with AA vs J9o with it all going in preflop. I lost the hand, smashed my fist down on the desk and voila, instant pain for my dumb assed temper tantrum. Let it be a lesson to all.
    LOL what a newb getting 200BB's in pre flop with J 9!!! Sucks for your hand did you punch the desk with your knuckles or by hitting it with soft part of the side of your hand? Cause I bang my desk everyonce in a while but I might be more careful
  21. #21
    was HU in a WSOP satty last year, got it in preflop with KK vs JJ, even in chips. A jack falls on the river........and i throw my ipod against the wall in front of me, which knocks down the guitar hanging on my wall, which hits me in the head landing me in the ER for.........2......thats right, 2 stitches. No other poker related injuries for me. One busted head and a broken ipod.
  22. #22
    PO$$E$$ED's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Trikflow77
    was HU in a WSOP satty last year, got it in preflop with KK vs JJ, even in chips. A jack falls on the river........and i throw my ipod against the wall in front of me, which knocks down the guitar hanging on my wall, which hits me in the head landing me in the ER for.........2......thats right, 2 stitches. No other poker related injuries for me. One busted head and a broken ipod.
    damn
    that must have been surreal
  23. #23
    ensign_lee's Avatar
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    DAMN....
  24. #24
    AHiltz's Avatar
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    Hammer fist. I made partial contact with the area just in front of the bone of the wrist and damaged some shit in there. My right pinky was numb for 2 days.

    Quote Originally Posted by STIdrivr
    Quote Originally Posted by AHiltz
    I hurt the tendons in my right hand after losing a $200 stack at $100NL with AA vs J9o with it all going in preflop. I lost the hand, smashed my fist down on the desk and voila, instant pain for my dumb assed temper tantrum. Let it be a lesson to all.
    LOL what a newb getting 200BB's in pre flop with J 9!!! Sucks for your hand did you punch the desk with your knuckles or by hitting it with soft part of the side of your hand? Cause I bang my desk everyonce in a while but I might be more careful
  25. #25
    So whats up ? You saying you are on the disabled list or what?

    Pay me 200 an hour I will click the mouse for you. I respect your handicap.
  26. #26
    Quote Originally Posted by Trikflow77
    was HU in a WSOP satty last year, got it in preflop with KK vs JJ, even in chips. A jack falls on the river........and i throw my ipod against the wall in front of me, which knocks down the guitar hanging on my wall, which hits me in the head landing me in the ER for.........2......thats right, 2 stitches. No other poker related injuries for me. One busted head and a broken ipod.
    Damn....
  27. #27
    Quote Originally Posted by Triptan3s
    Smashed my mouse, hand go cut up a little, just poured some 'tussin on it though.
    HAHAHA... Tussin cures everything.
  28. #28
    Galapogos's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Anon.E.Moose
    Gave a nice tug on my nuts after getting up and not noticitg that the laptop cable was tangled up in my groin area
    This one's my favorite cuz it means you were playing naked. You dirty bird.
  29. #29
    PO$$E$$ED's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Warpe
    Quote Originally Posted by PO$$E$$ED
    I would rather have all the toes on one feet broken than have hemorrhoids
    *bites tongue*
    strong is my gramar
  30. #30
    supermoneyz1 Guest
    Great post! (Sticky plz?..)

    I think we all have in one way or another are injured physically or emotionally from poker.

    Whether it be a cut on the finger from scraping it up against youre mouse while clicking fold or depression from enduring millions of bad beats. One thing is for sure, you may win you may lose but you can always learn something! Eager to read all future replies!
  31. #31
    Greedo017's Avatar
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    i hurt my hand one time when my girlfriend was complaining that i played too much poker
    i betcha that i got something you ain't got, that's called courage, it don't come from no liquor bottle, it ain't scotch
  32. #32
    Quote Originally Posted by Greedo017
    i hurt my hand one time when my girlfriend was complaining that i played too much poker
    She better have apologized for you having to hit her.
  33. #33
    a500lbgorilla's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by supermoneyz1
    Great post! (Sticky plz?..)
    You're crazy, man.

    I like you, but you're crazy.
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  34. #34
    I've had to go 2 days without turning my head on two separate occasions about 6 months apart. Some asshole that I hate sucked out on me over and over again and while sitting down I threw something at the wall with all my strength resulting in a pinched nerve in the neck.

    The 2 holes in the wall at that apartment cost me my deposit and then some.
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  35. #35
    Lukie's Avatar
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    I can't say I've ever injured myself or broken anything while playing poker. Or any video game or anything of the sort.
  36. #36
    Quote Originally Posted by Trikflow77
    was HU in a WSOP satty last year, got it in preflop with KK vs JJ, even in chips. A jack falls on the river........and i throw my ipod against the wall in front of me, which knocks down the guitar hanging on my wall, which hits me in the head landing me in the ER for.........2......thats right, 2 stitches. No other poker related injuries for me. One busted head and a broken ipod.
    how was your guitar? i play a '72 gibson les paul black beauty and it weighs about 800 lbs. if you get hit on the head by one of those bitches u go down hard.
    In answer to your question... it depends...
    alias2211.com poker
  37. #37
    to help w/ tilt prevention, i picked up a shitty everlast punching bag from a garage sale for $5 and hung it up in my den within reach of my PC. i'm almost a fucking blackbelt now and i've never even kicked the damn thing once.
    In answer to your question... it depends...
    alias2211.com poker
  38. #38
    euphoricism's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by givememyleg
    Quote Originally Posted by Greedo017
    i hurt my hand one time when my girlfriend was complaining that i played too much poker
    She better have apologized for you having to hit her.
    ROFLMAO. POTY dude.
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  39. #39
    Quote Originally Posted by Lukie
    I can't say I've ever injured myself or broken anything while playing poker. Or any video game or anything of the sort.
    me too. I guess I find it kinda fun...
    gabe: Ive dropped almost 100k in the past 35 days.

    bigspenda73: But how much did you win?
  40. #40
    Quote Originally Posted by alias2211
    Quote Originally Posted by Trikflow77
    was HU in a WSOP satty last year, got it in preflop with KK vs JJ, even in chips. A jack falls on the river........and i throw my ipod against the wall in front of me, which knocks down the guitar hanging on my wall, which hits me in the head landing me in the ER for.........2......thats right, 2 stitches. No other poker related injuries for me. One busted head and a broken ipod.
    how was your guitar? i play a '72 gibson les paul black beauty and it weighs about 800 lbs. if you get hit on the head by one of those bitches u go down hard.
    well i was lucky, it was just a fender strat. I keep my gibson in a case so things of that nature dont happen.

    The funny thing was it fell off the wall, hit my desk, and then the neck part of the guitar fell over and hit me in the head. I felt like a jackass but was so pissed off i didnt care. It also woke up my roommate, which was kinda funny.
  41. #41
    euphoricism's Avatar
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    Mexican or American? This things make a difference.
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  42. #42
    Quote Originally Posted by euphoricism
    Mexican or American? This things make a difference.
    an american.......blue agave with a white pick guard. Its my only electric, i play acoustic 90% of the time. I have a gibson j-35 thats my baby
  43. #43
    Muxy's Avatar
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    My foot hurts this morning

    GG 15k hand downswing.
  44. #44
    PO$$E$$ED's Avatar
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    hahahaha
    priceless
  45. #45
    Quote Originally Posted by Muxy


    My foot hurts this morning

    GG 15k hand downswing.
    i can fix that.

    the wall i mean.
    In answer to your question... it depends...
    alias2211.com poker
  46. #46
    I have thrown my shoes outside at a tree, smashed my mouse up but never hurt myself. Maybe stubbed my toe once or twice doing a bathroom run.
    Quote Originally Posted by mrhappy333
    I didn't think its Bold to bang some chick with my bro. but i guess so... thats +EV in my book.
  47. #47
    KY_Ace's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Muxy


    My foot hurts this morning

    GG 15k hand downswing.

    You're gonna need some wallboard joint compound, some joint tape ( it's a mesh tape about 2"wide ) 2 different sanding sponges one rough, one smooth, a 5" taping knife and a 10" taping knife to smooth it out. With a hole that big you might want to cut out a rectangular section around the hole and replace it with another panel of dry wall and use all of that stuff to make a smooth joint. If you're picky you might want to get some primer to put over it, I didn't bother, a white spot dosn't really bother me, a hole I can't have. All I have to do now is get a wooden panel to replace the panel in the wall that I put my elbow through. No broken bones but my blood's on my wall, nice gash on my elbow too, I'll see if I can scan it.

    Nice to know I'm not the only one that demolishes my home when I get rivered, I need a sign that says "beware of flying chairs". I've broken 5 chairs put 4 big holes in my wall, kicked the shit out of 2 doors, you could say I have a "Love Hate Relationship" with poker .
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  48. #48
    if the damage you cause is greater than the pot you lost i think you have problems.
    BR: $.1k
    Goal 2: July 1 $10k

    IIbeatsUU: lol u raised with that?

    you mini raised, therefore you desereve whatever you get....

  49. #49
    PO$$E$$ED's Avatar
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    I want to hear the stories about fists going through monitors, laptops getting thrown out windows/into walls/at wife
    I know they're out there
  50. #50
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  51. #51
    STIdrivr's Avatar
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    Heres a pretty gruesome one, this one time when I was playing I got a really bad beat and I got a paper cut!!!
  52. #52
    bigred's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by STIdrivr
    Heres a pretty gruesome one, this one time when I was playing I got a really bad beat and I got a paper cut!!!
    ::cricket cricket::
    LOL OPERATIONS
  53. #53
    euphoricism's Avatar
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    Wasnt it Rilla that smashed a window? Or was it a mirror?

    And PkrFanatic put a hole in a wall with his fist. He got on AIM afterward and just said, "My hand hurts." and I laughed.
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  54. #54
    Lukie's Avatar
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    i had a bad session that day
  55. #55
    I dont get bad beats.
  56. #56
    Quote Originally Posted by ilikeaces86
    I dont get bad beats.
    LIES!! I saw your bad beat post from a few days ago recently!
  57. #57
    Quote Originally Posted by givememyleg
    Quote Originally Posted by ilikeaces86
    I dont get bad beats.
    LIES!! I saw your bad beat post from a few days ago recently!
    Ok so you caught me Im a bad beat baby
  58. #58
    RESURECTION because I sustained an injury last night. It was kind of poker related. If I never would have started playing poker it never would have happened so close enough. Me and my friends were drinking and I talked my bud into throwing a deck of cards at his bare back/chest. I'm no Ferguson but I can throw them through a piece of paper/cut your ass up. After about 25 and his back cut up badly, I threw one as hard as I could and hit my friends beer out of his hand. It was a glass Busch Lite. It didn't hurt as bad last night, but this morning I couldn't even type without pain. I went to the walk-in just to make sure it wasn't broke or something stupid (since I have free insurance for another couple months) and find out I busted a bone in my pinky and palm, whatever the fuck bone it was called. GG cast on my mouse hand for 1+ months.

    I wanna sue Jesus for teaching me to throw cards fast. There wasn't a disclaimer that said not to try it.
  59. #59
    Quote Originally Posted by givememyleg
    RESURECTION because I sustained an injury last night. It was kind of poker related. If I never would have started playing poker it never would have happened so close enough. Me and my friends were drinking and I talked my bud into throwing a deck of cards at his bare back/chest. I'm no Ferguson but I can throw them through a piece of paper/cut your ass up. After about 25 and his back cut up badly, I threw one as hard as I could and hit my friends beer out of his hand. It was a glass Busch Lite. It didn't hurt as bad last night, but this morning I couldn't even type without pain. I went to the walk-in just to make sure it wasn't broke or something stupid (since I have free insurance for another couple months) and find out I busted a bone in my pinky and palm, whatever the fuck bone it was called. GG cast on my mouse hand for 1+ months.

    I wanna sue Jesus for teaching me to throw cards fast. There wasn't a disclaimer that said not to try it.
    so obv your friend stomped on your hand as retribution for the party foul of spilling his beer. or did you followup the beer knock down with a swift punch to the face for drinking busch lite in the first place?
    In answer to your question... it depends...
    alias2211.com poker
  60. #60
    Quote Originally Posted by ilikeaces86
    I dont get bad beats.
    Is that rob is your sig?

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