Official "that guy" comment thread

[Lukie]

Dealer: Game #5330701311: Lukieplaya wins pot ($437.70) with three of a kind, Eights
Dealer: Game #5330717592: Raaif wins pot ($5)
frnkthetank: stupid calls get rewarded eh Lukie
barrybeef: why didnt you show what you had frnk?
Lukieplaya: SORRY I TAKE ALL YOUR MONEY

[geoffm33]

americle9 had just won a pot with 74o, lightman338 told him he was going to note that. Now, we continue....

Dealer: Game #5352075277: americle9 wins pot ($0.65)
americle9: note that too
Dealer: foggle, it's your turn. You have 15 seconds to act
lightman338: i did
Dealer: foggle has timed out - hand is folded
Dealer: Game #5352083138: americle9 wins pot ($1.10)
americle9: do i need to show u those too
Dealer: Game #5352093997: geoffm33 wins pot ($0.20)
lightman338: no i got you
pokerstars77: u guys have a sense of humor
pokerstars77: thats good
lightman338: i am not meaning to fight poker is fun
pokerstars77: this is what makes it fun
Dealer: americle9 has two pair, Sevens and Sixes
Dealer: Game #5352099565: americle9 wins pot ($8.80) with two pair, Sevens and Sixes
pokerstars77: lol
pokerstars77: nice
americle9: good thing u took those notes
pokerstars77: 63 can beat anything
lightman338: keep playing like that it will all work out
pokerstars77: see there it is again 63
americle9: hold on go get some more money first

[Lukie]

heads up at 2/4NL after we get it all-in preflop. Me: AA, him: KK. There were a lot of raises preflop. I was kinda hoping he'd rebuy since I like playing HU but he left...

Dealer: Game #5366808591: Lukieplaya wins pot ($579.40) with two pair, Aces and Tens
r0bi25: lol
r0bi25: heads up[
Dealer: Hand cancelled
Lukieplaya: thats sick dude
Lukieplaya: i figured u had KK or the other AA
r0bi25: how convienent
r0bi25: god
r0bi25: nh bro
r0bi25: later
Lukieplaya: u 2
Lukieplaya: only on jokerstars

[midas06]

Lukie the point of this thread is to show that other people make gay comments, not you

[Sykedupp]

Lukie cant help but make 100% gay comments midas... easy on him


-Chris

[Staresy]

Dealer: sledx shows [5d Ad]
Dealer: mc1121 shows [3h Qc] short-stacked and on an inside str8
Dealer: sledx shows a pair of Fives
Dealer: mc1121 runner-runners a flush, Ten high (using the 3h)
Dealer: mc1121 wins the pot (3,050) with a flush,
Ten high
Dealer: Hand #745401979
IzzyBluffin146: i love internet poker
sledx: great
IzzyBluffin146: i already know i'll go out at the river
when it's all said and done...you just have to
pre-accept it

[sandstorm]

Texas Hold'em $100 NL (real money), hand #651,759,171
Table Monterrey, 27 Jun 2006 6:39 PM ET

Seat 2: morositas ($120.80 in chips)
Seat 4: bbq_ninja [ AC,9S ] ($89.50 in chips)
Seat 6: Sppaa1 ($176.30 in chips)
Seat 7: jrjrjr84 ($101.00 in chips)
ANTES/BLINDS
jrjrjr84 posts blind ($0.50), morositas posts blind ($1).

PRE-FLOP
bbq_ninja bets $5, Sppaa1 calls $5, jrjrjr84 folds, morositas folds.

FLOP [board cards AH,AS,KC ]
bbq_ninja bets $8, Sppaa1 calls $8.

TURN [board cards AH,AS,KC,KS ]
bbq_ninja bets $20, Sppaa1 bets $163.30 and is all-in, bbq_ninja calls $56.50 and is all-in.

RIVER [board cards AH,AS,KC,KS,8S ]

SHOWDOWN
Sppaa1 shows [ 5C,KH ]
bbq_ninja shows [ AC,9S ]
bbq_ninja wins $179.50, Sppaa1 wins $86.80.

SUMMARY
Dealer: Sppaa1
Pot: $267.30 | Rake: $1
morositas loses $1
bbq_ninja bets $89.50, collects $179.50, net $90
Sppaa1 bets $176.30, collects $86.80, net $-89.50
jrjrjr84 loses $0.50


Sppaa1: lucky cock

[geoffm33]

Dealer: alwayshuslin has a full house, Aces full of Queens
Dealer: Chewi79 has a full house, Aces full of Queens
Dealer: Game #5387313832: alwayshuslin ties for pot ($2.10) with a full house, Aces full of Queens
Dealer: Game #5387313832: Chewi79 ties for pot ($2.05) with a full house, Aces full of Queens
Chewi79: that is crap
Chewi79: i had better kicker
gord962: so?
Dealer: Game #5387329439: ThudJr wins pot ($0.25)
gord962: best 5 cards, not best 6 cards
ericlb111: lol

[arkana]

Party Poker No-Limit Hold'em, $ BB (6 handed) Hand History Converter Tool from FlopTurnRiver.com (Format: FlopTurnRiver)

BB ($170.45)
UTG =#A500AF(Villain)/ ($183)
MP ($205.55)
CO ($305.52)
Button ($100)
Hero ($321.10)

Preflop: Hero is SB with A, A. Hero posts a blind of $1.
UTG =#A500AF(Villain)/ calls $2, MP calls $2, 2 folds, Hero (poster) raises to $11, 1 fold, UTG =#A500AF(Villain)/ calls $10, MP folds.

Flop: ($28) A, 7, 2 (2 players)
Hero bets $18, Villain raises to $36, Hero raises to $99.55, Villain calls $63.55.

Turn: ($227.10) 3 (2 players)
Hero calls $209.55 (All-In), Villain calls $71.45 (All-In).

River: ($508.10) T (2 players, 2 all-in)

Final Pot: $508.10

Villain: nice bet, f.ag

[gabe]

arkana: The invader had to own says hunger and was from money lack to free vegetables

am i close???

[Anonymous]

After some guy got rivered:

Guy: What the ****, what are you doing calling a preflop raise with that ****.
Douche: wtf, cuz I'm on the button!

[Sykedupp]

After some guy got rivered:

Guy: What the ****, what are you doing calling a preflop raise with that ****.
Douche: wtf, cuz I'm on the button!

Crud... I do that all the time

-Chris

[Staresy]

arkana: The invader had to own says hunger and was from money lack to free vegetables

am i close???

I am thinking it is Afrikaans for "Goddamn Sonofabitch. I can't catch a frickin' hand"

[Lukie]

frostymind: ?
Dealer: frostymind, it's your turn. You have 15 seconds to act
Dealer: Player frostymind has requested TIME
Lukieplaya: just fold my blind next time thanks
frostymind: that's a stupid bet
frostymind: I have top pair
Lukieplaya: holla
Dealer: Game #5404622651: Lukieplaya wins pot ($146)
frostymind: you don't have it
frostymind: so fold like a little beotch
Lukieplaya: u folded not me son
frostymind: next time you won't be so lucky
Lukieplaya: hahahhahaaahhaaha

[Muxy]

50+5 SNG On Party

yurmom44: poker is the one sport where the scoreboard doesn't always tell the story
gdtrfb777: but its still what matters most like any sport dummy

[swiggidy]

PokerStars No-Limit Hold'em Tourney, Big Blind is t200 (8 handed) Hand History Converter Tool from FlopTurnRiver.com (Format: FlopTurnRiver)

Button (t5270)
SB (t2390)
BB (t5775)
UTG (t3300)
UTG+1 (t11105)
MP1 (t2577)
MP2 (t16895)
Hero (t11135)

Preflop: Hero is CO with A, 6.
4 folds, Hero raises to t600, 1 fold, SB raises to t2365, 1 fold, Hero calls t1765.

Flop: (t4880) 2, 2, 7 (2 players)

Turn: (t4880) 7 (2 players)

River: (t4880) A (2 players)

Final Pot: t4880

SB has Kh Ks (two pair, kings and sevens).
Hero has Ah 6s (two pair, aces and sevens).
Outcome: Hero wins t4880.

My first real experience:
SB>> Well played
SB's Friend>> I smell donk people
SB>> At least you tried to double me up
ME>> TY
SB>> GL holding on to my chips, heee hawww
ME>> I'll let you know how that works out

[Warpe]

Guy gets dealt pocket aces 3 times in the space of about 20 minutes, then follows up with a back to back...

Guy 1: AGAIN!!!!!
Guy 2: are you blowing the dealer?
Aces Guy: man, I must have a nasty dry spell coming my way
Guy 1: no kidding

[givememyleg]

I totally made my own thread in the tales section but put it her too!!!!! weeeeeeeeee

PokerStars No-Limit Hold'em, $0.50 BB (7 handed) Hand History Converter Tool from FlopTurnRiver.com (Format: FlopTurnRiver)

saw flop|saw showdown

BB ($48)
UTG ($126.65)
MP1 ($50.50)
MP2 ($50.15)
givememyleg ($58)
Button ($47.25)
SB ($25.80)

Preflop: givememyleg is CO with A, A.
UTG calls $0.50, 1 fold, MP2 raises to $3.5, givememyleg raises to $9, 3 folds, UTG folds, MP2 raises to $50.15 (All-In), givememyleg calls $41.15.

Flop: ($101.55) 3, Q, 8 (2 players, 1 all-in)

Turn: ($101.55) K (2 players, 1 all-in)

River: ($101.55) A (2 players, 1 all-in)

Final Pot: $101.55

Results:
MP2 has Qs Qh (three of a kind, queens).
givememyleg has Ah Ac (three of a kind, aces).
Outcome: givememyleg wins $101.55.

MP2 says: WTF nice 2 outter

[bigred]

Some donk talking to another donk

micah: wow you call all in with one pair huh you dumb abt
micah: u lucky my drawd didn't hit
micah: good to know you willing to go all in with just a pair

[mcatdog]

I thought this one was pretty funny.

POKERSTARS GAME #5650484776: HOLD'EM NO LIMIT ($0.50/$1.00) - 2006/07/23 - 01:22:40 (ET)
Table 'Sadachbia' 6-max Seat #6 is the button
Seat 1: HOOSIERS#1 ($41.10 in chips)
Seat 2: mcatdog ($100 in chips)
Seat 3: Scorpion11 ($18.80 in chips)
Seat 4: SexyStunnr ($23.35 in chips)
Seat 5: The Rogue ($61.20 in chips)
Seat 6: A-R-G ($40.95 in chips)
HOOSIERS#1: posts small blind $0.50
mcatdog: posts big blind $1
*** HOLE CARDS ***
Dealt to mcatdog [Ah Qs]
Scorpion11: calls $1
SexyStunnr: calls $1
The Rogue: calls $1
A-R-G: calls $1
HOOSIERS#1: calls $0.50
mcatdog: raises $6 to $7
Scorpion11: raises $11.80 to $18.80 and is all-in
SexyStunnr: calls $17.80
The Rogue: folds
A-R-G: folds
HOOSIERS#1: folds
mcatdog: raises $11.80 to $30.60
SexyStunnr: calls $4.55 and is all-in
*** FLOP *** [Th Kh 5s]
*** TURN *** [Th Kh 5s] [4d]
*** RIVER *** [Th Kh 5s 4d] [Qd]
*** SHOW DOWN ***
mcatdog: shows [Ah Qs] (a pair of Queens)
SexyStunnr: shows [Kc Jd] (a pair of Kings)
SexyStunnr collected $9.05 from side pot
Scorpion11: shows [5d 5c] (three of a kind, Fives)
Scorpion11 collected $56.45 from main pot
*** SUMMARY ***
Total pot $68.50 Main pot $56.45. Side pot $9.05. | Rake $3
Board [Th Kh 5s 4d Qd]
Seat 1: HOOSIERS#1 (small blind) folded before Flop
Seat 2: mcatdog (big blind) showed [Ah Qs] and lost with a pair of Queens
Seat 3: Scorpion11 showed [5d 5c] and won ($56.45) with three of a kind, Fives
Seat 4: SexyStunnr showed [Kc Jd] and won ($9.05) with a pair of Kings
Seat 5: The Rogue folded before Flop
Seat 6: A-R-G (button) folded before Flop

the next hand...

POKERSTARS GAME #5650495609: HOLD'EM NO LIMIT ($0.50/$1.00) - 2006/07/23 - 01:23:51 (ET)
Table 'Sadachbia' 6-max Seat #1 is the button
Seat 1: HOOSIERS#1 ($40.10 in chips)
Seat 2: mcatdog ($76.65 in chips)
Seat 4: SexyStunnr ($9.05 in chips)
Seat 5: The Rogue ($60.20 in chips)
Seat 6: A-R-G ($39.95 in chips)
mcatdog: posts small blind $0.50
Scorpion11: is sitting out
Scorpion11 leaves the table
SexyStunnr: posts big blind $1
*** HOLE CARDS ***
Dealt to mcatdog [Kd Td]
The Rogue: folds
A-R-G said, "unreal"
A-R-G said, "I tossed 9 9"
A-R-G: folds
HOOSIERS#1: folds
mcatdog: raises $75.65 to $76.65 and is all-in
SexyStunnr: calls $8.05 and is all-in
*** FLOP *** [Js Ks 9s]
*** TURN *** [Js Ks 9s] [2c]
*** RIVER *** [Js Ks 9s 2c] [2d]
*** SHOW DOWN ***
mcatdog: shows [Kd Td] (two pair, Kings and Deuces)
SexyStunnr: shows [5s 5c] (two pair, Fives and Deuces)
mcatdog collected $17.20 from pot
*** SUMMARY ***
Total pot $18.10 | Rake $0.90
Board [Js Ks 9s 2c 2d]
Seat 1: HOOSIERS#1 (button) folded before Flop (didn't bet)
Seat 2: mcatdog (small blind) showed [Kd Td] and won ($17.20) with two pair, Kings and Deuces
Seat 4: SexyStunnr (big blind) showed [5s 5c] and lost with two pair, Fives and Deuces
Seat 5: The Rogue folded before Flop (didn't bet)
Seat 6: A-R-G folded before Flop (didn't bet)

A-R-G said, "Seen enough. Won't play lotto poker."
A-R-G leaves the table

[midas06]

is that first hand a donkament hand?

[bigred]

I rivered a str8 on this guy, fun ensues

Daddylongunit: wow
Daddylongunit: wow ur a *
BigRedKM: how does one be a star?
Daddylongunit: star is a *
BigRedKM: or are you calling me an asterisk?
Daddylongunit: yes
BigRedKM: that's against my religion
BigRedKM: how dare you
Daddylongunit: i asterisked ur mom last night
BigRedKM: oh, she was playing cards last night?
Daddylongunit: ya
BigRedKM: she's supposed to be quitting
Daddylongunit: with my nuts
BigRedKM: oh yeah? ur nuts? you flop a boat?
Daddylongunit: ya
BigRedKM: she likes to chase flushes even though the board is paired
Daddylongunit: thats what your mom calls it
BigRedKM: well what else do u call a flush draw?
Jonalwayswins: hahaha
BigRedKM: Thanks for letting me know though, we're going to have to close her account now
BigRedKM: She's been nothing but trouble.

[geoffm33]

Dealer: Game #5682499951: rionam wins main pot (2625) with a straight, Ten to Ace
Dealer: InstantD finished the tournament in 8th place
Dealer: yankedynasty finished the tournament in 9th place
yankedynasty [observer]: eat a ****
yankedynasty [observer]: honkey

[mcatdog]

POKERSTARS GAME #5894333364: HOLD'EM NO LIMIT ($1/$2) - 2006/08/12 - 19:52:06 (ET)
Table 'Echemmon' 6-max Seat #4 is the button
Seat 1: alitostar ($119.45 in chips)
Seat 2: 2PAUL2 ($335.55 in chips)
Seat 4: TIGERSTUMP ($63.65 in chips)
Seat 5: mcatdog ($217.65 in chips)
mcatdog: posts small blind $1
alitostar: posts big blind $2
*** HOLE CARDS ***
Dealt to mcatdog [4d 4c]
2PAUL2: folds
Juice108 leaves the table
TIGERSTUMP: raises $6 to $8
ayoria joins the table at seat #6
mcatdog: raises $20 to $28
alitostar: folds
TIGERSTUMP: raises $20 to $48
mcatdog: raises $20 to $68
TIGERSTUMP: calls $15.65 and is all-in
*** FLOP *** [2s Qc Ac]
*** TURN *** [2s Qc Ac] [9c]
*** RIVER *** [2s Qc Ac 9c] [Ah]
*** SHOW DOWN ***
mcatdog: shows [4d 4c] (two pair, Aces and Fours)
TIGERSTUMP: shows [3c 5c] (a flush, Ace high)
TIGERSTUMP collected $127.30 from pot
*** SUMMARY ***
Total pot $129.30 | Rake $2
Board [2s Qc Ac 9c Ah]
Seat 1: alitostar (big blind) folded before Flop
Seat 2: 2PAUL2 folded before Flop (didn't bet)
Seat 4: TIGERSTUMP (button) showed [3c 5c] and won ($127.30) with a flush, Ace high
Seat 5: mcatdog (small blind) showed [4d 4c] and lost with two pair, Aces and Fours


Chat after the hand:

TIGERSTUMP said, "ok dog"
TIGERSTUMP said, "reraise 44"
TIGERSTUMP said, "nice"
mcatdog said, "obviously it's a good play against you"
TIGERSTUMP said, "yep u give me the odds to cal dummy"
mcatdog said, "ok"

[swiggidy]

damn, thought I had a good one but I mis-read the HH...

so BUMP!!!

[DaNutsInYoEye]

awesome... doggz, arkana, tylerk, muxy, bobbysalami. so refreshing.

great bump.

[IowaSkinsFan]

awesome... doggz, arkana, tylerk, muxy, bobbysalami. so refreshing.

great bump.

I wish these guys were still here.

[swiggidy]

awesome... doggz, arkana, tylerk, muxy, bobbysalami. so refreshing.

great bump.

I wish these guys were still here.

?

arkana posts every once in awhile
tylerk is too busy for poker
bobbysalami never posted that much

doggz and muxy chose their own fate

[LimpinAintEZ]

I rivered a str8 on this guy, fun ensues

Daddylongunit: wow
Daddylongunit: wow ur a *
BigRedKM: how does one be a star?
Daddylongunit: star is a *
BigRedKM: or are you calling me an asterisk?
Daddylongunit: yes
BigRedKM: that's against my religion
BigRedKM: how dare you
Daddylongunit: i asterisked ur mom last night
BigRedKM: oh, she was playing cards last night?
Daddylongunit: ya
BigRedKM: she's supposed to be quitting
Daddylongunit: with my nuts
BigRedKM: oh yeah? ur nuts? you flop a boat?
Daddylongunit: ya
BigRedKM: she likes to chase flushes even though the board is paired
Daddylongunit: thats what your mom calls it
BigRedKM: well what else do u call a flush draw?
Jonalwayswins: hahaha
BigRedKM: Thanks for letting me know though, we're going to have to close her account now
BigRedKM: She's been nothing but trouble.

this is good shit red - those guys with the "thats what your mom said" lines are pretty funny - if only because that is their entire repertoire...

[Galapogos]

awesome... doggz, arkana, tylerk, muxy, bobbysalami. so refreshing.

great bump.

I wish these guys were still here.

?

arkana posts every once in awhile
tylerk is too busy for poker
bobbysalami never posted that much

doggz and muxy chose their own fate

Plus, you weren't really supposed to know this, but they said they didn't like you anyway Iowa.

[Galapogos]

heads up at 2/4NL after we get it all-in preflop. Me: AA, him: KK. There were a lot of raises preflop. I was kinda hoping he'd rebuy since I like playing HU but he left...

Dealer: Game #5366808591: Lukieplaya wins pot ($579.40) with two pair, Aces and Tens
r0bi25: lol
r0bi25: heads up[
Dealer: Hand cancelled
Lukieplaya: thats sick dude
Lukieplaya: i figured u had KK or the other AA
r0bi25: how convienent
r0bi25: god
r0bi25: nh bro
r0bi25: later
Lukieplaya: u 2
Lukieplaya: only on jokerstars

Lukie the point of this thread is to show that other people make gay comments, not you

Haha since this thread got bumped I was scrolling through and found this. I missed it the first time around.

[lolzzz_321]

I talk to arkana nearly everyday on aim and skype.

[lolzzz_321]

I wish I saved some HHs from Party, Bigred had some classics.

[arkana]

$100NL HU game

villain: sorry down to 40
hero: np
hero: lets see if we can get you back to 100
hero:
villain: sounds good
villain: ouch
villain: oops
villain: well...
villain: this started so well
villain: all down hill
villain: brutal
villain: pure anger calls
villain: you got me going
villain: good work
villain: one card to fall to screw you
villain: i just suck today
villain: i hit nothing
villain: you hit everything
villain: sure is annoying
villain: just call and outdraw me
villain: .......
villain: what a joke this is
villain: i'm leaving
villain: go #$$# yourself seriously
villain: mine is pure set up
villain: hahahah &&!$ yourself i'm leaving
villain: #$@! you dealer
hero: ok
villain stands up

[Galapogos]

I love this thread. New stuff, some guy harassing the table:

mmullet: danno is a born loser
chicoriante: no you are Muffin
mmullet: chico's zingers are pricelss
mmullet: did you have to look that zinger up on the internet?
chicoriante: end of this road...i wil l have all your chips
chicoriante: nmark my word ..Drag muffin
mmullet: at the end of this road, you'll be bent over


Zulu had a dumb picture of himself as his avatar:
mmullet said, "TILT"
zulujimmo said, "zulu hates mullets"
mmullet said, "zulu hates taking good pictures"
zulujimmo said, "lol"
zulujimmo said, "yr not the first to say that"
dirtydazzla said, "so mullet u a boy or a girl cant tell"
mmullet said, "I was your date to the prom"
mmullet said, "zulu you have a very prominate chin"
zulujimmo said, "i think yrs is a bit more intimadating"
mmullet said, "your chin looks great with a set of nuts on it"


mmullet said, "zulu is a sexual predator"
zulujimmo said, "?"
mmullet said, "zulu loves frankie"
zulujimmo said, "are u on drugs"
mmullet said, "franky says relax"


franky139 said, "sorry guys, had to go take a poo"
zulujimmo said, "lol"
mmullet said, "zulu took a picture of his poo and uses it as his avatar"

[swiggidy]

cre_azn: SWIGGIDY YOURE A TOOL
cre_azn: YOU RAISE EVERY HAND

[swiggidy]

RAZA14: what a donkey u r
RAZA14: really sooooooo abd
RAZA14: disgusting this site
swiggidy: shhhh, I'm counting your chips
RAZA14: nooo ur mother is counting my chips

[meeloche]

PokerStars No-Limit Hold'em, $0.50 BB (6 handed) Poker-Stars Converter Tool from FlopTurnRiver.com (Format: FlopTurnRiver Cards)

Hero ($76.30)
SB ($64.15)
BB ($50.85)
UTG ($27.05)
MP ($75.45)
CO ($24.25)

Preflop: Hero is Button with , .
UTG calls $0.50, 2 folds, Hero raises to $2.5, SB raises to $5, 1 fold, UTG folds, Hero raises to $21, SB calls $16.

Flop: ($43) , , (2 players)
SB checks, Hero bets $44, SB calls $43.15 (All-In).

Turn: ($129.30) (2 players, 1 all-in)

River: ($129.30) (2 players, 1 all-in)

Final Pot: $129.31

Results in white below:
SB has Ah Ts (four of a kind, tens).
Hero has As Ac (full house, tens full of aces).
Outcome: SB wins $129.30.

airport2002 said, "f.ucking bluffer"
meisterpeppo said, "nice pot"
airport2002 said, "ty"
Hero said, "check the hh idiot i had AA"
airport2002 said, "why you dont show us your big a a"

[pantherhound]

the point when you know your table talk will get you a laggy image without needing to set it up-

Wull316: lol nh
And250757: ty
And250757: aa
Ben100410: lol u folded aa
And250757: there was a straight there
Ben100410: he wqas bluffing
Rus060210: good fold and
Ben100410: he wud bet less with straight
And250757: can overbet to make it look a bluff
Rus060210: or more to look weak,
Ben100410: he wants a call lol
Ben100410: not a fold if he has it
Rus060210: Yeh over betting for the call fool!
Rus060210: Over your head
Ben100410: shut up lol
U_man_u: nh
Wull316: ta
Rus060210: KK
Ben100410: u folded kk lol
Ben100410: LOL
And250757: good fold
Ben100410: haha
Wull316: great fold
Ben100410: lol
Rus060210: ty
Rus060210: Folded kk because i knew he had AA.
Wull316: kinda told ye
Rus060210: If it was a weak and short stacke player like i would have called deffo.
And250757: thought when u reraised me u had aa has well
Rus060210: knew u had aa with ur re raise obv
And250757: yes of course
And250757: got to play aa agressive
Rus060210: for sure.
Ben100410: lol
Rus060210: if you dont u end up getting beat by muck from players like Ben
Ben100410: lol
Wull316: lmao
Ben100410: u folded the second best hand in poker admit it that sucks
Rus060210: shut up
Ben100410: learn to play foo
U_man_u: was good fold....when u know u know
Ben100410: you know, that you have KK!
Ben100410: greet ahnds
U_man_u: he went all in.......cud only of been AA
And250757: nh
Ben100410: he could have pair
Wull316: be your a muppet
Ben100410: muppet yurself
Rus060210: Would u rather lose all in or lose £8
And250757: not all in to a re raise got to be aa
Wull316: ben
U_man_u: wud u of called £50 on KK?
Rus060210: Especially when reraised
Ben100410: umm, ya
Ben100410: i wud have kk
Ben100410: ????????/
U_man_u: nice.......got a note on that
Ben100410: ill puit a note on u
Ben100410: 'jackass'

[swiggidy]

^^ table coaching makes you look like an asshole. You may get action from this one player, MAY. The rest of the table is going to tighten up because they know better than to play with someone better, or they don't want to get berated for playing bad.

In my experience the player isn't going to loosen up against you, he's going to keep playing his game because they don't know how to adjust.

[Deanglow]

So I was playing live poker in South Florida with a bunch of old nitty idiots and there was one guy two to my right that stood out. He had to be at least 70 years old and a couple days from death. Huge patch on his throat that meant he smoked his life away and can now barely talk. He was "chatting" it up every once in a while saying like "ruckruckruck rabble rabble huhuh." Everyone nodded and felt sorry for the guy. And then we played a hand heads up.
$300 effective
Hero is BB with Jd 9d
BU limps, SB folds, BB checks.
FLOP: Qd, 10d, 2c
Hero bets $20 (standard) BU minraises to $40, Hero raises to $150, BU minraises to $260, Hero goes allin, BU calls
TURN: 3h
RIVER: 8c
BU flips over QQ and has a huge shit-eating grin. Hero flips over Jd9d and a bigger shit eating grin.

BB: RABBLE RABBLE RABBLE DRAW RABBLE RUCK RUCK DRAW CAUGH

After about five minutes of this inaudible ruckus in my ears
Hero: English only at the table please
Everyone at the table went dead silent, and even one old nitty guy called the floor on me. I don't know what the big deal was.

[swiggidy]

That's fucked up but I laughed a lot

[Galapogos]

Table folded to villain in SB, he raised my BB, I 3-bet, he 4-bet, I pushed, he folded.

that guy: what did you have gala?
Galapogos: I put everything I had in the middle of the table
that guy: no what cards?
Galapogos: I had two Roberto Luongo rookie cards
that guy: ya right
Galapogos: So you could say I had a good pucket pair
that guy: funny fish
Galapogos: What? So you don't think those cards have good value??
that guy: shut up
Galapogos: Actually you're right, I guess it was more of a semi-bluff because they'll probably be worth a lot one day
Galapogos: If you had even one Gretzky I would have been toast tho
that guy: i folded queens idiot
Galapogos: Those had me beat too
that guy: i kniow you had aces
Galapogos: I had goalies, GOALIES

Table folds around to us again, He open pushes from the SB, I insta-call with AA and he snap leaves the table as I sit there wondering how people can think chat is -EV.

[Alibi]

nh gala

[kingnat]

After filling up on the river to beat his flopped straight.. villian had this to say...

Math Genius said, "?"
Math Genius said, "hows that possible"
Math Genius said, "i had u drawing dead"
that guy said, "uh.. yaah... that's pretty much the definition of drawing dead..."
Math Genius said, "you know u got lucky"
Math Genius said, "goddamn"
Math Genius said, "my **** never holds"
that guy said, "maybe you should eat less fiber?"

[kmind]

PokerStars Game #15151666655: Hold'em No Limit ($0.25/$0.50) - 2008/02/08 - 17:18:41 (ET)
Table 'Leona' 6-max Seat #3 is the button
Seat 1: palimina ($6.70 in chips)
Seat 2: laborit ($49.25 in chips)
Seat 3: toddanderson ($57.75 in chips)
Seat 4: Trudpok ($9.15 in chips)
Seat 5: allthesenuts ($39.25 in chips)
Seat 6: Patchie1 ($27.60 in chips)
Trudpok: posts small blind $0.25
allthesenuts: posts big blind $0.50
*** HOLE CARDS ***
Dealt to toddanderson [Tc Ts]
Patchie1: folds
palimina: folds
laborit: calls $0.50
toddanderson: raises $2 to $2.50
Trudpok: folds
allthesenuts: folds
laborit: calls $2
*** FLOP *** [7d 3d 7h]
laborit: checks
toddanderson: bets $4
laborit: calls $4
*** TURN *** [7d 3d 7h] [Ks]
laborit: checks
toddanderson: checks
*** RIVER *** [7d 3d 7h Ks] [Jc]
laborit: bets $18.50
toddanderson: calls $18.50
*** SHOW DOWN ***
laborit: shows [Td 9d] (a pair of Sevens)
toddanderson: shows [Tc Ts] (two pair, Tens and Sevens)
toddanderson collected $48.25 from pot
*** SUMMARY ***
Total pot $50.75 | Rake $2.50
Board [7d 3d 7h Ks Jc]
Seat 1: palimina folded before Flop (didn't bet)
Seat 2: laborit showed [Td 9d] and lost with a pair of Sevens
Seat 3: toddanderson (button) showed [Tc Ts] and won ($48.25) with two pair, Tens and Sevens
Seat 4: Trudpok (small blind) folded before Flop
Seat 5: allthesenuts (big blind) folded before Flop
Seat 6: Patchie1 folded before Flop (didn't bet)

next hand:
laborit said, "?"
laborit said, "CHAMPION"
laborit: folds
toddanderson: folds
laborit leaves the table

[martindcx1e]

Math Genius said, "my **** never holds"
that guy said, "maybe you should eat less fiber?"

lol awesome

[kingnat]

Math Genius said, "my **** never holds"
that guy said, "maybe you should eat less fiber?"

lol awesome

i agree with martindcx1e... i am pretty awesome.

[a500lbgorilla]

strong bump

[bigred]

Can someone find my post (obv not in this thread) where I shoved over a guy with aces (think I had a mid pp) pf and hit my set and go on to lecutre him how I missed my last 7 PP's and I was statistically due?

[Galapogos]

Can someone find my post (obv not in this thread) where I shoved over a guy with aces (think I had a mid pp) pf and hit my set and go on to lecutre him how I missed my last 7 PP's and I was statistically due?

I thought it was in this thread.

[bigred]

Well, since I asked where it is...probably not

[bigred]

Found it, looks like my post spawned this very thread

http://www.flopturnriver.com/phpBB2/...light=bigredkm

[sinister1]

This is from a $1/$2 NLHE game in Atlantic City. Everyone who has ever played live has experienced the "old man." They are weak/loose/passive and generally spewy stations. Its basically a lock that any guy over 60 not named Brunson is playing this style. I am playing a standard game and raising a normal amount of hands pre but the rest of the table is passive.

Old man: Son, you got a problem.
Me: What's that?
Old man: Its a disease called raise-itis and you've got a bad case of it.
Me: ...
Old man: Raise, raise, raise. You can just call too you know.

Later on he needled me but I am sure it was not even on purpose. I have QQ and raise because of my uncontrollable case of raise-itis and get 4 callers. I flop QJJ and end up getting it in on a blank turn with villain who has Jx and spikes the case Jack to take down a $500 pot.

Random player 1: Damn, that's a one outer!
Random player 2: What a bad beat!
Old man: That's not a bad beat, I'll tell you about a bad beat. I once flopped a full house with 44 on 4TT flop so I checked it and the turn came another T so I checked it. And can you believe it but the river came T and some guy won with Ace high.
Me: So did anyone ever bet or did you guys just check it down?
Old Man: No, we just checked it down
Me: So you lost like $10 or something?
Old Man: No, just $2, I limped preflop.
Me: ...

[bigred]

I had the "old man" at a table at Harrah's in New Orleans. I had just sat down at a table and within three hands realized that the old guy and a young guy in his mid 20's across the table had some bad blood. The old man was visibly drunk and they both got it in on a 445 board. The kid had 55 and the man had 44. The man stands up a goes fuck you motherfucker, this is motherfucking america!!!! ti which the dealer called over security and they had a long chat with the old man about appropriate behavior. I laughed a lot.

[BennyLaRue]

He was mad that he won with quads?!?