i nearly flunked high school

i benched 320 and deadlifted 440 at 180 body weight

i once played chicken with my car and won (the 'game' was inadvertent, but happened nonetheless)

i would bang rachel maddow

i once fasted on nothing but water and liquor for 17 days, ive done several 7-10 day fasts

back before i understood logic and empiricism, i believed the earth was 6k years old, humans with superpowers existed, that disease was a product of toxins, and that 9/11 was a government conspiracy

im afraid of trying to be happy because im afraid it won't ultimately make me happy and i'll have to live the rest of my days with regret and knowing life is a bitch and then you die