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  1. #1
    spoonitnow's Avatar
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    Default stake me?

    Fuck.

    Someone stake me for 10nl? I'm busto after I got pissed after getting literally 6 set under sets in this morning's session and I blew my roll at 2knl on Stars.
  2. #2
    read my post. apparently it's not ok to ask to be staked. and it's supposedly also against the rules to offer to stake.
  3. #3
    spoonitnow's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by iolzizlyi
    read my post. apparently it's not ok to ask to be staked. and it's supposedly also against the rules to offer to stake.
    Yeah but this is different because 10nl isn't really poker.
  4. #4
    omgooses .

    is more poker really the solution ?
    hoozay !!! i beated real life !1!!
  5. #5
  6. #6
    You're not serious?
  7. #7
    Quote Originally Posted by wufwugy
    You're not serious?
    You're not serious?
  8. #8
    kmind's Avatar
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    PM me I'll stake you
  9. #9
    I'll put up $4, I want 5:1 on profits up and through 200nl
  10. #10
    Quote Originally Posted by givememyleg
    Quote Originally Posted by wufwugy
    You're not serious?
    You're not serious?
    You're serious?
  11. #11
    spoonitnow's Avatar
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    Also I'm looking for prob bets on still making $100k this year.
  12. #12
    spoonitnow's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by wufwugy
    You're not serious?
    lol of course i'm not serious

    unlike the rest of the retarded omfg i blew my 5-figure bankroll threads
  13. #13
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    lol, i was actually believing it because you were talking about running bad this morning

    i was going to link you back to your bankroll management rant
  14. #14
    Quote Originally Posted by iolzizlyi
    read my post. apparently it's not ok to ask to be staked. and it's supposedly also against the rules to offer to stake.
    You really can't afford a $10 MTT?
  15. #15
    spoonitnow's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by shazbox
    lol, i was actually believing it because you were talking about running bad this morning

    i was going to link you back to your bankroll management rant
    Haha I'd forgotten about that but yeah I was -550 earlier but am about even now b/c i fucking pwn
  16. #16
    Quote Originally Posted by wufwugy
    Quote Originally Posted by givememyleg
    Quote Originally Posted by wufwugy
    You're not serious?
    You're not serious?
    You're serious?
    You're serious?
  17. #17
    Quote Originally Posted by givememyleg
    Quote Originally Posted by wufwugy
    Quote Originally Posted by givememyleg
    Quote Originally Posted by wufwugy
    You're not serious?
    You're not serious?
    You're serious?
    You're serious?
    I'm serious?
  18. #18
    euphoricism's Avatar
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    GGGUUYYTTTHH IM THUUPERR THEERRIAALLL
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  19. #19
    Lukie's Avatar
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    2knl and 5knl on stars are badly rigged
  20. #20
    Quote Originally Posted by Lukie
    2knl and 5knl on stars are badly rigged
    You're not serious?
  21. #21
    Quote Originally Posted by WildBobAA
    Quote Originally Posted by iolzizlyi
    read my post. apparently it's not ok to ask to be staked. and it's supposedly also against the rules to offer to stake.
    You really can't afford a $10 MTT?
    if by afford you mean do i have at least the buyin in my stars account, then yes. but following br guidelines then no.
  22. #22
    spoonitnow's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by iolzizlyi
    Quote Originally Posted by WildBobAA
    Quote Originally Posted by iolzizlyi
    read my post. apparently it's not ok to ask to be staked. and it's supposedly also against the rules to offer to stake.
    You really can't afford a $10 MTT?
    if by afford you mean do i have at least the buyin in my stars account, then yes. but following br guidelines then no.
  23. #23
    Jack Sawyer's Avatar
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    Jack-high straight flush motherfucker
    sooo many people got leveled

    nice one spoon
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  24. #24
    spoonitnow's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Jack Sawyer
    sooo many people got leveled

    nice one spoon
    tyvm

    btw I was 16-tabling when i made the post lolololol
  25. #25
    lol you're so funny spoon. seriously. like i laughed so hard. because like sand inside a vagina..it would probably have to hurt. you know like friction and stuff. so i get it! god that is hilarity. you know i'm not sure what i did to piss you off much but i dont care as long as you keep posting such comical material.
  26. #26
    Quote Originally Posted by Jack Sawyer
    sooo many people got leveled
    You're not serious?
  27. #27
    spoonitnow's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Jack Sawyer
    sooo many people got leveled who didn't know any better
    This is more like it.
  28. #28
    spoonitnow's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by iolzizlyi
    lol you're so funny spoon. seriously. like i laughed so hard. because like sand inside a vagina..it would probably have to hurt. you know like friction and stuff. so i get it! god that is hilarity. you know i'm not sure what i did to piss you off much but i dont care as long as you keep posting such comical material.
    Okay so here's what happened from the full ring forum, just so we're all on the same page here.

    iolzizlyi was all like omfg i hate playing in my bankroll b/c i can't beat bad players at 5nl so i moved up to 50nl for 3 orbits and luckboxed some $$$

    bigspenda73 was all like all losing players bitch about not being about to beat bad players and none of the big winners on this site talk like that

    iolzizlyi replied all pissy like "now that you've berated me, would you like to give me some advice or not? i never said everybody at 5NL is sooo bad and they never fold and they always get there" even though that's almost word for word what he did say but doesn't really matter to anyone b/c he's a newbie and we've seen hundreds of them do the same shit

    bigspenda73, in his straight-forward no-bullshit approach that we've all come to know and love, says that if he could beat 5nl he would be at 10nl, and if he doesn't have the time and patience to do that then he doesn't have the tools to play poker at higher levels

    spoonitnow (that's me) chimes in with the following, "To OP: the more you keep doing this kind of shit, the more you're going to donate to the poker economy. Sorry, but that's pretty much how it is."

    At this point I wrote the bankroll management rant thread. Then a few days later iolzizlyi asked for a stake to the $11 100k guaranteed on PokerStars and his thread got locked.

    His post gave me the idea to start my fake "omfg I'm busto" thread which had nothing to do with him except I used the same title of the thread as an attention-getter. It was making fun of people who tilt and go busto or close to it with 5-figure or higher bankrolls. In this thread, WildBobAA asked iolzizlyi, "You really can't afford a $10 MTT?" This wasn't meant as an insult, but iolzizlyi took it as one.

    So, iolzizlyi started to PMS, saying "you guys claim to be all about helping people, but from what i see, several regs are all about making fun of people that ask what they consider to be stupid questions. i don't play 200NL but i still try to analyze the posts and yeah i may make mistakes, but i'm trying to learn."

    Does anyone remember those Butterfinger candybar commercials with the Simpsons where Bart would have his Butterfinger plugged into the wall and Homer would grab it, get zapped, yell DOH, grab it again, get zapped, yell DOH, repeat? I feel like I'm watching one of those commercials.

    Anyway, I guess iolzizlyi is sad because he feels like winning players are "picking on him" when we're really "answering his questions" and "giving him advice".

    If you want to go blow half your paycheck on 50nl each week, be my guest. That money will help the poker economy. If you want to grind it out from 5nl and be ballin in a couple of years, that's cool too and I wish you the best of luck.

    But overall, and I mean this in the nicest way, if you stop acting like a bitch, people will stop treating you like one.
  29. #29
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    Quote Originally Posted by Spoonitnow
    If you want to go blow half your paycheck on 50nl each week, be my guest
    Thanks - but is it okay if I blow my whole paycheck on 50nl? Cos that's what I seem to be doing at the moment ;_;
  30. #30
    2 iolzizlyi
    I wanted to write this in your thread before it got locked, but did not want to offend anyone. I do not want to offend you in this thread either, so take it as a friendly advice from a guy who was playing your stakes a few months ago. So here is something you should consider:

    If you cant afford 11$MTT- you're playing ~10nl.
    If you play 10nl- youre just starting out and should wait untill you are ready for bigger buy in tourneys(usually you won't have to wait longer then a month untill you move to 25nl)
    If you don't want to wait that long and get better at poker before playing MTTs out of your bankroll-you most likely dont realize the skill difference between 10nl and 11$mtt.
    Not to bring you down,but you really have to question your expectation to place well in a 100k tournament.

    Your problem seems very clearly to be- high expectations of yourself. You have to adjust your goals and wait untill you're reay for certain tourneys, not ust take shots at the bigger money because you believe in yourself.
    There is nothing wrong in believing in yourself, however, overestimating yourself is proven to be quite a bad thing in poker.
    Don't mean in in an offensive way at all. That's just how it is.

    A lot of poker players struggle with ego, and the sooner they realize it, the better it is.
  31. #31
    chardrian's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by spoonitnow
    So, iolzizlyi started to PMS, ... blah blah blah
    I rarely, if ever, get pms.
    http://chardrian.blogspot.com
    come check out my training videos at pokerpwnage.com
  32. #32
    spoonitnow's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by chardrian
    Quote Originally Posted by spoonitnow
    So, iolzizlyi started to PMS, ... blah blah blah
    I rarely, if ever, get pms.
    lololol
  33. #33
    Jack Sawyer's Avatar
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    Jack-high straight flush motherfucker
    Weeeeeeee Internetz Dramah


    Someone come up with prop bets pronto!
    My dream... is to fly... over the rainbow... so high...


    Cogito ergo sum

    VHS is like a book? and a book is like a stack of kindles.
    Hey, I'm in a movie!
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fYdwe3ArFWA
  34. #34
    Quote Originally Posted by Jack Sawyer

    Someone come up with prop bets pronto!
    $5 last longer, Hubble's Hold'em ftw
  35. #35
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    spoonitnow > iolzizlyi in funiness.

    And also spoonitnow is a much easier name to read, so double win.
  36. #36
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    Quote Originally Posted by iolzizlyi
    if by afford you mean do i have at least the buyin in my stars account, then yes. but following br guidelines then no.
    Then screw bankroll management, enter the tourney, and don't lose.
  37. #37
    spoonitnow's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by shazbox
    spoonitnow > iolzizlyi in funiness.

    And also spoonitnow is a much easier name to read, so double win.
    tyty *takes a bow, away from audience, in a thong*
  38. #38
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    ...I just threw up a little in my mouth.
  39. #39
    Galapogos's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Jack Sawyer
    Weeeeeeee Internetz Dramah


    Someone come up with prop bets pronto!
    I bet $1000 that spoonitnow already won.


    Quote Originally Posted by sauce123
    I don't get why you insist on stacking off with like jack high all the time.
  40. #40
    Miffed22001's Avatar
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    ill stake you for 5knl HU

    wait what?
  41. #41
    spoonitnow's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Miffed22001
    ill stake you for 5knl HU

    wait what?
    let's go fishstick
  42. #42
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    Quote Originally Posted by Miffed22001
    ill stake you for 5knl HU
    binding contract! BINDING CONTRACT!
  43. #43
    spoonitnow's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Galapogos
    Quote Originally Posted by Jack Sawyer
    Weeeeeeee Internetz Dramah


    Someone come up with prop bets pronto!
    I bet $1000 that spoonitnow already won.
    Well it's not really a winning or losing thing to me. I honestly just think it's a maturity thing relative to poker understanding.

    Also, thanks to everyone who was willing to stake me, even though you're all stupid for thinking I'd do that =P
  44. #44
    will641's Avatar
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    i can't believe i missed this thread. nice analogy with the simpsons commercial spoon. i completely forgot about those.
    Cash Rules Everything Around Me.

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