Things That Do Not Tilt You

[surviva316]

-When restaurants stack chairs in a manner that makes it look like they're 69ing

-When the Phillies are out of playoff contention (amazing things start happening like I can have sex between the hours of 7pm and 10pm again)

[MadMojoMonkey]

-Living across the street from a grocery store: It's like my pantry is HUGE. So much win.

-A power strip on the floor for all the room lights: I turn the lights on and off with my toe.

-When I cook a pizza and the fire alarm DOESN'T go off.

[Micro2Macro]

-when women admit they are wrong about something
-the sun
-vitamin water

[bikes]

+1 to vitamin water.

esp revive and acaiberry

[rong]

Buying a few pieces of cool art to sell, having no real interest in them, getting to hang them on my living room wall at home for storage.

Example:

[bikes]

looks like two dicks cumming rainbow jizz

[bikes]

CANNOT UNSEE

[rong]

Hermann Rorschach says you're a homo.

[d0zer]

Hermann Rorschach says you're a homo.

Yeah well if he's so smart, how come he's dead?

Edit: totally looks like dicks

[d0zer]

You know what doesn't tilt me? Nascar fans. Because I don't know any nascar fans, nor do I have any contact with them. So they do not tilt me.

[OngBonga]

cider
chinese food
weed

[d0zer]

It totally doesn't tilt me how this thread is being used as a list of things that people like. While these are in the superset of things that don't tilt you, it ignores the set of things that u don't care about or other things u don't necessarily like, but don't tilt you.

Why doesn't this tilt me? Well because that would be a ridiculous thing to be tilted by.

[OngBonga]

And neither does it tilt me that dozer failed to realise my list was based purely on the fact that at that very moment they were the three dominating aspects of my day, and I was not tilted in the slightest.

It also doesn't tilt me that soon I will have tea.

[d0zer]

Ongabonga does not belong in this thread as he is a thing that tilts many people.

[surviva316]

It totally doesn't tilt me how this thread is being used as a list of things that people like. While these are in the superset of things that don't tilt you, it ignores the set of things that u don't care about or other things u don't necessarily like, but don't tilt you.

Why doesn't this tilt me? Well because that would be a ridiculous thing to be tilted by.

The second thing I listed was something I might normally think would tilt me, but it doesn't.

[wufwugy]

can't actually think of something

[supa]

It doesn't tilt me to know that at some point, everything will tilt me in one way or another.

[BennyLaRue]

Looking for the things that don't not tilt me thread.

[wufwugy]

Hey I guess this is something that doesn't tilt me: WA, OR, and CO will legalize marijuana this year. The Feds won't crack down, and contrary to popular view, they haven't been cracking down on marijuana in the states anyways. So shortly after the first three states get it passed this cycle, other states will soon follow, then perhaps by the end of this decade, it may become a federal issue and could be legalized fully in the whole country

[bikes]

you do realize this thread is about things that are supposed to make you angry and annoyed but don't right?

[wufwugy]

you do realize this thread is about things that are supposed to make you angry and annoyed but don't right?

Yes, but I already tried that and failed. Everything angers me

[OngBonga]

It doesn't tilt me knowing I tilt dozer.

[Luco]

you do realize this thread is about things that are supposed to make you angry and annoyed but don't right?

in which case:

OngBonga

[OngBonga]

Lucothefish doesn't tilt me because even though he's mean to me he has a superb avatar.

[Luco]

Lucothefish doesn't tilt me because even though he's mean to me he has a superb avatar.

Aww thanks, have some rep owait...

[bikes]

m2m's avatar does not tilt me.

[MadMojoMonkey]

when gf is annoyingly, distractingly cute

in that "would you please just grow up" kind of way

[spoonitnow]

Mitt Romney

[surviva316]

Mitt Romney

Most interesting one so far

[a500lbgorilla]

Leaving work 30 minutes early because why the fuck not?

[a500lbgorilla]

Most interesting one so far

I'm betting it's because in what should be a contentious political season rife with deep running debates between close friends and family, this year every debate can be settled by "But your guy is Romney."

[surviva316]

I'm betting it's because in what should be a contentious political season rife with deep running debates between close friends and family, this year every debate can be settled by "But your guy is Romney."

I would not like for any debate to be settled like this.

[bikes]

Kanye West

[chardrian]

I rarely, if ever, get pms

[bigred]

Too busy getting babies!

[spoonitnow]

Mitt Romney

He speaks the truth a lot more than people like to admit.

[supa]

He speaks the truth a lot more than people like to admit.

lol

[MadMojoMonkey]

In order to speak truth, you have to say something. Making broad, generalized comments that do not specifically state anything is only truth in the metaphoric, philosophical sense. E.g. America is great! I will cut taxes. I will encourage self action. I believe in freedom.

All of these can be Truth (with a capitol T), but these statements rely on emotional buzz words that imply different things to each listener. It is easy to agree with statements like this because the listener must GUESS the orator's meaning by the buzz words, and the listener either wants or does not want to agree, so they get what they expect.

Nonetheless... this does not tilt me. People are people and none of us is right about anything but our own opinions and even then, well, things change over time.

[bikes]

He speaks the truth a lot more than people like to admit.

WHITE POWER.

DON'T LET THE LIBERAL MEDIA, TELL YOU HOW TO THINK AND FEEL. IF YOU HAVE HATE IN YOUR HEART LET IT OUT.

WHITE POWER.

COLIN POWELL? CONNILINGUS RICE? CONNILNGUS RICE SOUNDS LIKE A MEXICAN DISH. LETS SEND HER BACK TO MEXICO AND LET THE MEXICANS EAT HER.

WHITE POWER.

[a500lbgorilla]

My first car was a white saturn. Ran it into the ground. Everyone knew it as White Power.

That memory doesn't tilt me.

[surviva316]

WHITE POWER.

DON'T LET THE LIBERAL MEDIA, TELL YOU HOW TO THINK AND FEEL. IF YOU HAVE HATE IN YOUR HEART LET IT OUT.

WHITE POWER.

COLIN POWELL? CONNILINGUS RICE? CONNILNGUS RICE SOUNDS LIKE A MEXICAN DISH. LETS SEND HER BACK TO MEXICO AND LET THE MEXICANS EAT HER.

WHITE POWER.

Woah, did Mitt Romney really say this? Epic speech, imo.

[surviva316]

It totally doesn't tilt me how this thread is being used as a list of things that people like. While these are in the superset of things that don't tilt you, it ignores the set of things that u don't care about or other things u don't necessarily like, but don't tilt you.

Why doesn't this tilt me? Well because that would be a ridiculous thing to be tilted by.

As you can see, the lifeline is divided into two polar extremes: Tilt and Not Tilt. Tilt is in the negative energy spectrum. And not tilt is in the positive energy spectrum.

All over FTR, people have come together to join hands. People who believe that human life is absolutely too important, too valuable, and too precious to be controlled by tilt.

So I say to you, I'm not tilted, you mongrels! How about you?

Is that all the gusto you can muster? I said, I'm not tilted!

Now that’s a tiny tiny bit better. But I can still sense some posters out there who are actually tilted by saying "I'm not tilted." Entirely too many young poker players today are completely paralysed by tilt. They surrender their bodies to the temptation and destruction of drugs, alcohol, and premarital sex. Now, I’m going to tell you a little story today. It’s a heartbreakingly sad story about a young man whose life was completely destroyed by these instruments of tilt. A young man, searching for not tilt in all the wrong places. His name was d0zer.

Well, d0zer, I think you're tilted. You are a tilt prisoner. A textbook example. Do you see the tilt, people? This poster is tilted to death by the truth. Son, it breaks my heart to say this, but I believe you are a very troubled and confused young man. I believe you are searching for the answers in all the wrong places.

Your sarcasm is a product of tilt.

[supa]

My first car was a white saturn. Ran it into the ground. Everyone knew it as White Power.

That memory doesn't tilt me.

My wife used to have a white saturn. she's Mexican so no one knew it as white power.

That memory doesn't tilt me.

[bikes]

Hi, I'm Surviva.

.

[supa]

^sick burn.

[a500lbgorilla]

My wife used to have a white saturn. she's Mexican so no one knew it as white power.

That memory doesn't tilt me.

haha no one knew, but it still was White Power.

[supa]

haha no one knew, but it still was White Power.

touche

[d0zer]

Now that’s a tiny tiny bit better. But I can still sense some posters out there who are actually tilted by saying "I'm not tilted." Entirely too many young poker players today are completely paralysed by tilt. They surrender their bodies to the temptation and destruction of drugs, alcohol, and premarital sex. Now, I’m going to tell you a little story today. It’s a heartbreakingly sad story about a young man whose life was completely destroyed by these instruments of tilt. A young man, searching for not tilt in all the wrong places. His name was d0zer.

Well, d0zer, I think you're tilted. You are a tilt prisoner. A textbook example. Do you see the tilt, people? This poster is tilted to death by the truth. Son, it breaks my heart to say this, but I believe you are a very troubled and confused young man. I believe you are searching for the answers in all the wrong places.

Your sarcasm is a product of tilt.

This A+ creative writing piece is even better if you read it in the voice of foghorn leghorn

[spoonitnow]

What the hell is wrong with Romney?

[bigred]

What the hell is wrong with Romney?

Liar

[JKDS]

who let the dogs out!

[surviva316]

Liar

Harlot!

[kingnat]

My kids don't tilt me nearly as much as they could. Especially considering, I am very easy to tilt, I was raised by an severely-micromanaging dad, I am a very interested and involved parent, and well, have you seen children?... holy fuckballs they can be fucking annoying.

One of the results of this is that while I'm (relatively) patient with my kids, I have next to zero patience for other people.

[d0zer]

My kids don't tilt me nearly as much as they could. Especially considering, I am very easy to tilt, I was raised by an severely-micromanaging dad, I am a very interested and involved parent, and well, have you seen children?... holy fuckballs they can be fucking annoying.

One of the results of this is that while I'm (relatively) patient with my kids, I have next to zero patience for other people.

At least yer allocating your limited reserve of patience with correct priority!

[spoonitnow]

Obama spending thousands of dollars in taxpayer money to apologize in Pakistan doesn't tilt me as much as it should because I'm used to it by now. Romney 2012.

[Jack Sawyer]

Spoon doing political trolling does not tilt me.

[surviva316]

Obama spending thousands of dollars in taxpayer money to apologize in Pakistan doesn't tilt me as much as it should because I'm used to it by now. Romney 2012.

Your attempts to spice up this thread are appreciated, though I don't think there's much hope of it working.

[spoonitnow]

Well, I was trying to give examples of things that don't tilt me.

[Sasquach991]

spoonitnow doesn't tilt me

Also:
barking dogs
crying babies
y'all

[MadMojoMonkey]

I have a paying job for the first time since getting my degree, even if it is being a worker monkey in an assembly shop.

Hoping it will lead to a real salary and working as an engineer.

[Jack Sawyer]

Backing up data of a failing hard drive to an eSATA drive at full speed (100+ MB/s) does not tilt me whatsoever. Just beautiful.

[supa]

I have a paying job for the first time since getting my degree, even if it is being a worker monkey in an assembly shop.

Hoping it will lead to a real salary and working as an engineer.

The process of moving up through a company can take years. Be careful about empty promises and doing things that you have a degree for for less money than an engineer would do them. They will almost always take advantage of that.

Twenty years from now you could be working for the same company but for half of what you're worth because you're comfortable and have security.

Unless you have a valid reason to think differently, keep looking for work directly related to your field of study.

[supa]

Oh, and if they take your stapler, burn the building down.

[swiggidy]

People devolving an otherwise cool thread into a political discussion. Oh wait, wrong thread...

When my homebrew doesn't turn out exactly the way I had hoped it would.

[rong]

Oh, and if they take your stapler, burn the building down.

[Shotglass]

-when women admit they are wrong

you mispelled "when hell freezes over"

[surviva316]

Getting scouring feedback on my projects.

I actually think that being a poker player and has a lot to do with this. When it comes to poker:
Premise) I want to improve my winrate; Premise) I just had someone point out some reasons why I suck; Conclusion) Fuck yeah maybe now I can work these things out and plug some leaks and make some monaaaaaaaay!!

Similarly with writing: Premises) I want to get published, have not had anyone pick up my manuscript yet and I assume that this is at least some kind of negative reflection on my writing; Conclusion) Will you please for the love of fuck stop sugar-coating everything in the interest of being a good human being or some stupid shit like that and just tell me why I suck so that I can make serious considerations for how to suck less in those areas which might allow me to be good enough to make it in this business where an astronomically small percentage of people make it!!!

(Or in the case that I do actually get negative feedback, then refer to the conclusion in the poker syllogism).

[eugmac]

surviva, post excerpts here to get ripped to shreds IMO.

[surviva316]

Haha, epic idea would be to start my own Blog/Operation and post a Chapter per week or Part per month to be FTR workshopped.

[rong]

Do it! I'm sure lots of us would be interested in reading it.

[MadMojoMonkey]

Haha, epic idea would be to start my own Blog/Operation and post a Chapter per week or Part per month to be FTR workshopped.

Do it. +EV

I can't wait to see how many revisions before it becomes a tale of drunken debauchery by FTR regz, seemingly immortal in their ability to vomit continuously.

You might need to have full control over deleting posts that were derailing the serious tone you're going for.

[joker131]

goverments that promise everything, but in the end dont give a cows pat about anybodys views on anything

[MadMojoMonkey]

People who are proud of not knowing something.

[bode]

My kids don't tilt me nearly as much as they could. Especially considering, I am very easy to tilt, I was raised by an severely-micromanaging dad, I am a very interested and involved parent, and well, have you seen children?... holy fuckballs they can be fucking annoying.

One of the results of this is that while I'm (relatively) patient with my kids, I have next to zero patience for other people.

ha ha, so much this. i've never been a particularly patient person, but i have the patience of a saint with my kids. other people not so much.

[spoonitnow]

hoes