Wifey has left me for a week.

[d0zer]

...with nobody to curb my beer intake or number of hours of poker per day, I'm potentially in a whole world of trouble.

Let's hope I run well ...

[flomo]

hookerxs!

[d0zer]

hookerxs!

I'm thinking slutty high school girls cause they're cheaper (will work for weed & beer)

[WillburForce]

my missus was away the last few days - bliss....beers, red wine, pizza,poker.

I was literally pushing her out the door - "Course I'll miss you, yes I love you too, no I won't stay up all night playing poker, no I won't drink the house dry, yes we'll talk every night, yep miss you too, yes I love you too, blah blah blah...for the love of god will you please just fuck off so I can start my 3 days of degenrate gambling and drinking?"

last bit was said under my breath obviously...

[d0zer]

...for the love of god will you please just fuck off so I can start my 3 days of degenrate gambling and drinking?"

I've already got gads of debauchery lined up. Tonight: SOOooOooft Home game ($20 drunken rebuy tourney)

Tomorrow night: Old "hardcore party-lifestyle" friend + house concert.

Sunday: 6 hours of poker

I'm like will farrell's character in old school when the ball & chain is temporarily removed

[will641]

so youre going streaking?

[d0zer]

so youre going streaking?

I'll probably spend the week in a kiddy pool full of ky, beer in hand just masturbating like a caged chimp.

[Pythonic]

My wife has been out of town for a week already and she won't be back for another 3 weeks. Having the time of my life over here, lol.

[Lukie]

hookerxs!

I'm thinking slutty high school girls cause they're cheaper (will work for weed & beer)

Nice.

[Aces]

my missus was away the last few days - bliss....beers, red wine, pizza,poker.

I was literally pushing her out the door - "Course I'll miss you, yes I love you too, no I won't stay up all night playing poker, no I won't drink the house dry, yes we'll talk every night, yep miss you too, yes I love you too, blah blah blah...for the love of god will you please just fuck off so I can start my 3 days of degenrate gambling and drinking?"

last bit was said under my breath obviously...

ROFL. Sound like something I'd say.

[mrhappy333]

My wife has been out of town for a week already and she won't be back for another 3 weeks. Having the time of my life over here, lol.

doooooooood HOOKERZ

[wufwugy]

I'll probably spend the week in a kiddy pool full of ky, beer in hand just masturbating like a caged chimp.

major sig material

[flomo]

I'll probably spend the week in a kiddy pool full of ky, beer in hand just masturbating like a caged chimp.

major sig material

you are correct sir

too drunk now to change

[UG]

...with nobody to curb my beer intake or number of hours of poker per day, I'm potentially in a whole world of trouble

don't do both at the same time. I did that once and it didn't turn out well.

[Galapogos]

so youre going streaking?

I'll probably spend the week in a kiddy pool full of ky, beer in hand just masturbating like a caged chimp.

Please remember to remove the kids from the pool first.

[d0zer]

...with nobody to curb my beer intake or number of hours of poker per day, I'm potentially in a whole world of trouble

don't do both at the same time. I did that once and it didn't turn out well.

been there done that.

Speaking of which, I got drunk off my ass last night at the home game. Holy crap my friends are donks. Despite me being a bit of a spewtard I Won the tourney for $120, and was up $40 in the .25/.50 cash game. I played the tourney well, but by the time we got around to the cash game I was 10 beers deep or so, which led to some spewtarditude. AI with the doyle preflop vs a $20 stack? GREAT IDEA!


I probably could have been up $100 in the cash game. Ah alcohol...sigh.

Well...time to hop back in the kiddy pool. I needs me some wireless so I never have to leave it...

[kevster]

this thread is fucking brilliant. end of.

[FyrFytr998]

My wife went away for a vacation. It would have been awesome for me, except she left the kids at home.

FTL.

[d0zer]

My wife went away for a vacation. It would have been awesome for me, except she left the kids at home.

FTL.

It's times like this I'm glad I only have 3 dogs, 2 ducks, and a parrot...

[Galapogos]

My wife went away for a vacation. It would have been awesome for me, except she left the kids at home.

FTL.

It's times like this I'm glad I only have 3 dogs, 2 ducks, and a parrot...

It's times like this I'm glad I'm not a weirdo...

[d0zer]

It's times like this I'm glad I didn't marry a weirdo...

FYP

[thizzSantaCruz]

My wife went away for a vacation. It would have been awesome for me, except she left the kids at home.

FTL.

It's times like this I'm glad I only have 3 dogs, 2 ducks, and a parrot...

what do you do with pet ducks? do you have to cage em in or what?

[d0zer]

what do you do with pet ducks? do you have to cage em in or what?

I f'n hate those stupid ducks. They're aggressive and lack basic social skills. I think I got the 'alpha male' to finally stop attacking me though

Usually I don't have to deal with em', wifey puts them in their 'house' (a modified doghouse) at night so raccoons etc don't kill em'. During the day they just wander around the backyard and try to attack the dogs, who have been (mostly) trained not to kill them. There were a few close calls with our hound though. Can't blame the guy...he's a hunter at heart.

It's a long story as to how we got them, but short answer is that wifey's had outdoor birds since she was a kid, and loves them (god knows why). We've also got two chickens which I like a lot more cause they're confined to their coop, and do something useful like provide us with almost daily eggs.

[will641]

what do you do with pet ducks? do you have to cage em in or what?

I f'n hate those stupid ducks. They're aggressive and lack basic social skills. I think I got the 'alpha male' to finally stop attacking me though

Usually I don't have to deal with em', wifey puts them in their 'house' (a modified doghouse) at night so raccoons etc don't kill em'. During the day they just wander around the backyard and try to attack the dogs, who have been (mostly) trained not to kill them. There were a few close calls with our hound though. Can't blame the guy...he's a hunter at heart.

It's a long story as to how we got them, but short answer is that wifey's had outdoor birds since she was a kid, and loves them (god knows why). We've also got two chickens which I like a lot more cause they're confined to their coop, and do something useful like provide us with almost daily eggs.

eat them ldo.

[d0zer]

eat them ldo.

trading sex for duckmeat is -EV

[BennyLaRue]

trading sex for duckmeat is -EV

Depends. How big and juicy are the (duck) breasts?

[Galapogos]

what do you do with pet ducks? do you have to cage em in or what?

I f'n hate those stupid ducks. They're aggressive and lack basic social skills. I think I got the 'alpha male' to finally stop attacking me though

Usually I don't have to deal with em', wifey puts them in their 'house' (a modified doghouse) at night so raccoons etc don't kill em'. During the day they just wander around the backyard and try to attack the dogs, who have been (mostly) trained not to kill them. There were a few close calls with our hound though. Can't blame the guy...he's a hunter at heart.

It's a long story as to how we got them, but short answer is that wifey's had outdoor birds since she was a kid, and loves them (god knows why). We've also got two chickens which I like a lot more cause they're confined to their coop, and do something useful like provide us with almost daily eggs.

My parents actually used to have a pet duck. They said they'd get it drunk all the time by dipping bread in bear then feeding it to the duck. Have you done this? Is it cool?

[d0zer]

My parents actually used to have a pet duck. They said they'd get it drunk all the time by dipping bread in bear then feeding it to the duck. Have you done this? Is it cool?

First thing I'm trying when I get home, but I think I'll use whiskey instead.

...just what I need...to make the damn thing wanna fight even more