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Raising the flop is a judgement call, personally I wouldn't do it with 22, but others might. You really should have made a .30 bet on the flop. If the guy behind you c/r you then you can at least get all your money in on the flop.
Set over set happens. There's very little you can do about it, it takes exception reads to figure out you are behind. (i.e. An extremly tight person who only pushes with nuts pushes on that flop.)
Consider it good luck that he only had $4 instead of $10. Seriously.
For now, I only play at low stakes ($5, $10) and slow playing with a vunerable hand (like a set) does more damage. At low stakes people like to call, so make healthy bets, don't let them draw into a hand that beats you no matter how fluky (like a very reasonable KQ in your example).
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