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 Rilla meets Gabe
Cliff notes at the end.
Friday Night we throw a huge party at my place and I get obliterated, im planning on taking Saturday easy becuase I have an assload of hw even though its just the first week of classes when I see Lukie Sterile left me an aim message to call gabe cuz he's so balla he bought a new phone. I give gabe a ring and he tells me he's in town and that we're partying tonight. Oh shit, there goes taking it easy i guess. So im just chillin with my friends smokin some like hooka acid stuff that's legal (the name escapes me but it was lame) and a party just kinda erupts in our apartment. Gabe finally rings up and tells me that Ive gotta manuever my way to Fox Ridge to ball out.
I get a ride and tell them that i wont need a pickup becuase gabe promises me he can get me back. I meet gabe out front and he introduces himself as and we head up to his buddies apartment (who he is visiting at VT) and I have apparently arrived at the tail end of a monster game of 100 cup beer pong. Gabes fluid motions, constant smile, loud chappelle show quotes and barking suggests he was on the losing side. He introduces me to his buddies and I entertain with my wit for a little while when all his friends ask me "poker balla? do you have like a fancy watch? gabe bought us dinner and tipped like 60 bucks, do you do that?" Unfortunately, my balla status slides when I try to tell them that Im school busto. gabe starts ripping major ass and we leave since the place is getting fumagated. We head over to some other lame party where gabe knows every chick there. We decided to head back to more intimate drinking quarters to really put ourselves under.
Gabe and I chill and decided to drunk dial FTRers finest. Lukie, bigred, courtie were consulted. If we had hydro's number and first name, we'd probably have started ballin with him HINT HINT. gabe and i finally get up to the table when gabe starts smacking shots out of the air. Things no normal man would be allowed to do at the beerpong table, gabe's ballinity allows him to bend, break, re-write and ball at will. Eventually one of gabes friends Andy suggest we sneak out, grab some sweet greens and smoke a bowl or two.
Andy, gabe and I end up infront of some random apartment, sucking down the fine smokey air when some random guy walks by. "Hey man, is your name so-and-so?" So so and so and gabe start shooting the breeze and Andy just kinda stiffens up like a dog ready to attack. He doesnt even awknowledge the pipe im trying to pass him. "hey, come smoke a bowl with us man." "NO!" Andy barks, "I will not smoke with him." I shoot a what the fuck glance at Andy. And gabe tries to calm the whole thing down. Andy calms down a bit and starts packing a fresh bowl in the peace pipe and calls the unknown over "Shake my hand and smoke this." "Im not shaking your hand, dude." And the scene erupts, Andy stands in unknowns face. Unknown does that like head neck swerve saying "What man, you want some?" Or something stupid to that effect. They put themselves in classic stand-off positions and someone pushes the other. I look at gabe who you can tell is trying to figure out appropriate odds to lay me on the fight when i say "This is stupid" and step right in the middle, which was probably stupid. I move Andy back and ask him whats up when I find out that Andy got run over by this guys older brother. Andy had both his legs broken all his senior year and was in a wheel chair. So i pat Andy down for weapons, grab the freshly packed pipe and take a huge hit which gets stuck in my chest as a burp that I cant freaking get out. So gabe is left to settle down this fight while Im trying to relieve this burning in my chest becuase of this trapped pocket of pot-smoke. I finally get it out when I get hit like a wave and my legs basically go from under me. Niiiice. So now Im kinda drifting in and out on whats going on but so and so left and we got word that its cool to head over to his place and patch shit up.
When we get to random Fox Ridge party 3, Im gone and I know it. I barely know whats going on around me and the few conversations I did have I could hear myself saying the wrong words. I finally look to gabe and tell him that I gotta get back since it's now 2 am and I cant just catch the bus. Gabe, obliterated, grabs his keys and says "Lets roll." I get warned by everyone who "knows" gabe not to do it. And as this happens, a cop car decides to drive on past. Well shit, it would only take one glance at me to know im not capable of talking my way out of a paper bag. "Gabe are you 21?" "My fake id says I am." he smiles. Shit, so I hop inside and duck into a back room with some other guys and my whole body feels panicked but my head feels like its just about to go dormant. After the cops leave, I realize that my final plan of getting home, walking, wasn't going to work since I would stumble every 5 steps and cops were probably all over the place. Gabe tries to get me a cab, a place to crash, a DD and all i can do is nod becuase I cant connect one thought to the same word to come out of my mouth. Gabe is resolved to drive me back home or into a tree. I sneak to a back room, have some guy write me step by step directions to get back since I dont really know the way and I roll out.
The cops are all over the fucking place and Im having an impossibly hard time walking and walking properly. Finally, about half way back Im consdering just laying down in the woods and walking the way home tomorrow after Ive sobered up when some shiney car with spinnaz flys by and stops infront of me. The waitress from earlier shouts at me to get in the car, I oblige and see gabe behind the wheel and his friend in the back seat, seat belt on tightly, wide-eyed saying "dont worry, he's cool." Though, im pretty sure he said it more to sooth his nerves then mine becuase my whole thought process at that point was "Hey gabe. Fuck it, lets go home" Gabe speeds home jokingly swerving around becuase the cops would never suspect a drunk driver to be acting like a drunk driver (Hes thinking 4th level, baby).
I finally get back to my place only to find it filled with people Ive never met. In my bed, on my floor, in my hallway, like 10 people. So I head over to my buddies place at 3 am praying they're still awake. Of course they are, some huge drama erupted about some super hot super psycho chick in on of my buddies beds crying becuase she got rejected. I look at everyone trying to piece the whole thing together. "Shes really crying man." "Wheres Kyle?" "He went out the window and to Kates to hide" Fuck this shit, I need a bed. So I go to kyles room, doors locked. "Hey, Kyles here, he wants to talk." "Door unlocks, I blow by her, hit the sheets and my day ends.
Cliff notes:
Fuck that shit, read the damn thing.
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Originally Posted by elipsesjeff
nh sir
