Back from Honduras

[fasin8ing]

I just spent 2 months in Honduras .... If anyone has any questions about the country please ask... Oh .. Its nice to be back to the States , and back at FTR.... I missed you all...

FASIN

[gabe]

just tell us about it

[givememyleg]

Welcome back! Do tell! Did you get loved long time? Any fun drinking stores? Anything totally omg wtf crazy happen?!?! Your presence was not missed at all though.

[Irisheyes]

Is Honduras code for Jail?

[Miffed22001]

when will my drugs be forwarded?

kthx.

[Galapogos]

Actually, yes, I have a question. Who the hell are you?


jk

[bigred]

Did they have large cocks there like mine?

[vqc]

Did they have large cocks there like mine?

no one can have a large cock like yours.

[midas06]

come sit at my limit games again pls

[fasin8ing]

Honduras is your typical Latin America 3rd world country complete with rice, donkeys, and mariachi bands. I went to my first demonstration there though ... Pretty cool .. The military had riot gear and everything.

Arriving there was awesome... I had to drive about 2 hrs to my work and new home for 2 months. There is nothing but rocks, cliffs, and lots of trees on the way from Tegucigalpa to Comayagua. There is a presidential race going on right now and they spray paint on the rocks for political advertising. You would see something like Jesus 06 painted on rocks for miles. I stopped and got a coke on the way and ate a papusa. A papusa is like some corn tortilla with some cheese on it...

The exchange rate is awesome... 18 Lempiras to one dollar. Its about 10 -12 lempiras for a coke and about 30 lemps for a beer. They have three types of beer... Port Royal, Salva Vida, and Barena... Salva is dark and good... Port Royal is like a cheap ale and light.... Barena is like Natural Light made in a 3rd world country.

Hondurans do the weirdest shit. I saw a mariachi band walking in the middle of no where and the next town had to have been 20 miles up the road. They had their gear and everything and they were dressed up... UHHHH DUHHH... Thats how I knew they were a mariachi band. I saw one Honduran carrying a porcelian toilet on his head walking down the road... He had it flipped over so the bowl was over his head... I rolled down my window and yelled shithead... He didnt understand. Through the mountains there are alot of downhills and so forth.. The kids there fit 3 people on a BMX bike and the dude on the handlebars holds on to the back of the tractor trailer truck doing 35-40 mph.... It is sick looking but i guess it works... one in the middle, one on the seat, and one on the handlebars holding the back of a trailer on a freeway... Crazy .

I saw one guy downtown and he was a fag ... Had to have been ... He had no shirt on and had a 5 year olds shirt pulled down to his waist and was wearing it as a skirt.... All I saw was two little baby sleeves dangling down on each side and started busting up laughing. You see donkeys everywhere... As a matter of fact I fell off one last weekend. I was drunk as hell off some CICLON ... ( super good rum and tequilla mixed together in bottle ) and i donkey punched the donkey and he took off without me .. My back was pretty fucked up. Oh well ..

Of course I found a poker game to get into... It was no different than anywhere else I had been to. Usually some Army Officers or Contractors and Pilots that like to play. I played in a little 20 dollar at a time ( NL ring style) rebuy till you die game. The first night I played with a couple idiots and took them for 350 bucks. Only took me around 2 hrs. The following weeks I played with no one. The second to the last week I played in the same style game but with around 7 people and came up 200 bucks and called it a night.

I met some pretty cool people over there and one of my friends that is a retired Army Aviator (Sean) is selling a bar/restaurant for like 80K .. So if anyone is interested in living a great life like a king... please let me know. You can basically build a mansion there for 40-50 K ... Like MTV Cribs fat ... Sean and I got pretty wasted lots of nights together and he married a Honduran girl from there. He pretty much sits behind his bar everynight and pours Bacardi ORO ( gold for your white ppl) into a glass of coke and gets drunk and counts his money. He has made plenty in ten years from that place and wants to sell it to concentrate on his family. The other place across the street is Jimis... Jimis is a broke ass bar with what honduran girls call spiders... A spider is what we call sluts.. The lemon drop is a cool little place down the street and it is a upscale kind of place and they have awesome drinks and Jose the owner will always hook you up with drinks...

Drinking got old really quick... I had to find a Famarcia to buy some pills to help me along the way.. I went to the mall and asked for basically every type of pain killer made and they didnt have shit. I asked for Codeine and it was on.. Some dude behind me dressed like Brad Pitt from Fight Club came up and whipered in my ear " That shit is good and you will like it" ... I laughed and paid 20 bucks for 30 mg of something called Tylex with codeine .. I got 30 pills in a bottle and taking 2 with drinks was plenty to make the night funner.

If you guys want to visit a country in Latin America you have to be able to dance. Bachatta and Merenge sp? They love it... You have to speak a little spanish too... Most good girls that look nice went to a upscale bilingual school and will speak english to you if you try and speak spanish first. I fucked with a couple girls over there and they are very controling... You have to be careful also because some would love for you to support them. I dated a doctors daughter for the entire time while I was over there. She was 21 and awesome. Never asked for anything but some dick... I will post some pictures later. These girls will fuck the shit out of you .. It is a really good time... Any other questions?

[theDEEPdish]

Barena is like Natural Light made in a 3rd world country.

this seems like the best insult for anything

[theDEEPdish]

was there any internet available to you in honduras

[freechus9]

I got 30 pills in a bottle and taking 2 with drinks was plenty to make the night funner.

Your liver must be fucked.

[bigred]

I like how he mentions the gay guy before the chicks he banged. Freud alarms are going off like crazy.

[fasin8ing]

was there any internet available to you in honduras

Yes .. But its all on a DOD network .. I mainly worked at the Embassy.. I couldnt really play poker of surf the web.

[fasin8ing]

I like how he mentions the gay guy before the chicks he banged. Freud alarms are going off like crazy.

I saw him with the chick I was banging.

REDEEMED!

[bigred]

I like how he mentions the gay guy before the chicks he banged. Freud alarms are going off like crazy.

I saw him with the chick I was banging.

REDEEMED!

Doesn't change that you mentioned him first. Come over to my place tonight. Flowers and red wine as gifts.

[givememyleg]

Sounds like you had as much fun as you could for being in Honduras.

[fasin8ing]

I like how he mentions the gay guy before the chicks he banged. Freud alarms are going off like crazy.

I saw him with the chick I was banging.

REDEEMED!

Doesn't change that you mentioned him first. Come over to my place tonight. Flowers and red wine as gifts.

Light the candles.

[fasin8ing]

Sounds like you had as much fun as you could for being in Honduras.

And then some.. I will post some stories one by one when I get my brains back... I am still co-dependent on codeine... JK...

Nice to be back dude... Nice to be back...

Wait until I bust out the salt story.

[Greedo017]

Wait until I bust out the salt story.

one time i stole a salt shaker from this bar. It was salt in a corona bottle with a blue cap that had holes in it, I thought it was pretty cool.