The "Do not watch this movie it is awful" thread

[a500lbgorilla]

dane cook is funny. He has much better delivery on the jokes he steals than the people who came up with them.

[kingnat]

dane cook is funny. He has much better delivery on the jokes he steals than the people who came up with them.

It does take mad skills to watch some one and say to yourself, "Well shit, if I constantly walk around on stage like a motivational speaker while I deliver that joke, I'll make millions!! Plus people are so unaware that when they here these disgruntled old farts complaining about my stealing jokes, all my young adoring fans will think 'da jus hatin rock on dane cook!'"

[kingnat]

red dawn was so awful imo, didnt make any sense

oh oh EPIC MOVIE is the worst

How can you compare Red Dawn.. a movie about the Cuban invasion of North America, which contains one of the coolest "let's get loaded for bear at the local gun store and kick some ass"-scenes in all of cinematic history... to Epic Movie which is designed to be a massive fart. I'm not saying Red Dawn is great, but it's at least a solid 80's pulp movie with lots of booby traps, dead people, hunting for food... all sorts of stuff.


I suppose I should add something to the list...

I have only seen it once in the theater, but "The Rules of Attraction" was pretty atrocious... and I'm quite a big fan of indie-like films. I can imagine it might work for some people on some level, but there is so much wrong or un-interesting about the film.. I'd definitely recommend no one see it.

I'd also put Star Wars: Attack of the Clones in a basket of movies that I wish I hadn't watched... Other than Yoda's fight and the playing of the Imperial March (at least I think that's the name of the empire's theme) at the end there was almost nothing redeemable about this movie at all... just further sucking the life (Episode 1 started teh sucking) out of what still is and should've remained a stand-alone trilogy.

[Da GOAT]

As for Red Dawn, I will say Ive only seen it in the last year. I couldnt bare to watch it all. Now there are some 80s movies that were class then but super cheesy now.

But i think its awful.

Epic Movie isnt meant to actually suck otherwise they wouldnt make it.

Kingnat - Ill agree with the Star Wars movies. I never liked the whole franchise. just not my cup of tea

[BennyLaRue]

red dawn was so awful imo, didnt make any sense

I'm not saying Red Dawn is great, but it's at least a solid 80's pulp movie with lots of booby traps, dead people, hunting for food... all sorts of stuff.

Plus it has 100% Swayze in it. Some movies are only 25% Swayze or, god forbid, 0% Swayze. But Red Dawn is 100% Swayze and you can't go wrong with that.

Bonus: C. Thomas Howell!

[a500lbgorilla]

dane cook is funny. He has much better delivery on the jokes he steals than the people who came up with them.

It does take mad skills to watch some one and say to yourself, "Well shit, if I constantly walk around on stage like a motivational speaker while I deliver that joke, I'll make millions!! Plus people are so unaware that when they here these disgruntled old farts complaining about my stealing jokes, all my young adoring fans will think 'da jus hatin rock on dane cook!'"

and yet at the same time, comedy is an art.

If cook would just find himself a team of comedy writers and throw together a nightly show, he'd do very well.

Louis CK (for example) has the art of throwing a joke together down, Dane (who steals from the aforementioned) has the art of throwing a joke at you down. Why deify one aspect and shun the other? They both take their own form of brilliance.

edit: I loved dane cooks first album and since then ive liked him less and less. But he still shows you that CK's material in the right mouth can be laugh out loud, roll off your chair hilarious. While CK couldn't really deliver a joke that would get me going more than my standard "haha" response. Dane can bring the fire, CK can supply the coal is all im getting at. 1 man comedy is hard to master. Jon Stewart and Conan O'Brien have writers, why not Dane?

[sinister1]

red dawn was so awful imo, didnt make any sense

oh oh EPIC MOVIE is the worst

How can you compare Red Dawn.. a movie about the Cuban invasion of North America, which contains one of the coolest "let's get loaded for bear at the local gun store and kick some ass"-scenes in all of cinematic history... to Epic Movie which is designed to be a massive fart. I'm not saying Red Dawn is great, but it's at least a solid 80's pulp movie with lots of booby traps, dead people, hunting for food... all sorts of stuff.


I suppose I should add something to the list...

I have only seen it once in the theater, but "The Rules of Attraction" was pretty atrocious... and I'm quite a big fan of indie-like films. I can imagine it might work for some people on some level, but there is so much wrong or un-interesting about the film.. I'd definitely recommend no one see it.

I'd also put Star Wars: Attack of the Clones in a basket of movies that I wish I hadn't watched... Other than Yoda's fight and the playing of the Imperial March (at least I think that's the name of the empire's theme) at the end there was almost nothing redeemable about this movie at all... just further sucking the life (Episode 1 started teh sucking) out of what still is and should've remained a stand-alone trilogy.

I saw this movie in the theater and the audience actually boo'ed after it finished.

[kingnat]

dane cook is funny. He has much better delivery on the jokes he steals than the people who came up with them.

It does take mad skills to watch some one and say to yourself, "Well shit, if I constantly walk around on stage like a motivational speaker while I deliver that joke, I'll make millions!! Plus people are so unaware that when they here these disgruntled old farts complaining about my stealing jokes, all my young adoring fans will think 'da jus hatin rock on dane cook!'"

and yet at the same time, comedy is an art.

If cook would just find himself a team of comedy writers and throw together a nightly show, he'd do very well.

Louis CK (for example) has the art of throwing a joke together down, Dane (who steals from the aforementioned) has the art of throwing a joke at you down. Why deify one aspect and shun the other? They both take their own form of brilliance.

edit: I loved dane cooks first album and since then ive liked him less and less. But he still shows you that CK's material in the right mouth can be laugh out loud, roll off your chair hilarious. While CK couldn't really deliver a joke that would get me going more than my standard "haha" response. Dane can bring the fire, CK can supply the coal is all im getting at. 1 man comedy is hard to master. Jon Stewart and Conan O'Brien have writers, why not Dane?

I would agree whole-heartedly with your assessment, if the Dane Cook album came with a writing credit on it for Louis CK I'd like him just fine.... as is... pretty douchey.

[DaHorror]

"Taken" which proves that you can take any old man and make him into an action hero with enough fast-scenes and stunt doubles.
As action movies go, it was not bad, but the overall plot was flat out retarded.

And how can we not mention the last Indiana Jones vs. The Stereotypical Aliens movie? Is it just too obvious?

Oh and one of the worst movies of all time?
"The Happening" by M. Night Shyamalan

...has to be the dumbest biggest waste-of-time movie I've ever sat through...that woulda been a 'leave the theatre' one 'cept for the internal giggling entertainment due to the plain ridiculousness of the whole thing!

[mcatdog]

That wasn't interesting? The ending was the best part!

I guess the ending was the best part in the sense that the rest of the movie was even more boring but I don't think dropping a video camera on the floor is much of a climax.

[thizzSantaCruz]

Max Payne sucks, watched it this weekend.

I should have read this thread before renting it last nite. It was probably one of the worst movies I have ever seen.

[Deuce Blue]

Not even close. Showgirls may be the only movie with lots of nudity I had to walk away from. I swear to God I thought the thing HAD to be about over and I just shut it off. It wasn't even half done. God awful movie. And the naked Saved By The Bell Chick was hotter with clothes ON.

[wufwugy]

CK is the funniest fucking comedian anybody can find. only competition is gaffigan

shitasspetfuckers

[wufwugy]

red dawn was so awful imo, didnt make any sense

I'm not saying Red Dawn is great, but it's at least a solid 80's pulp movie with lots of booby traps, dead people, hunting for food... all sorts of stuff.

Plus it has 100% Swayze in it. Some movies are only 25% Swayze or, god forbid, 0% Swayze. But Red Dawn is 100% Swayze and you can't go wrong with that.

Bonus: C. Thomas Howell!

dude u r gay. awesomely gay.

selleck? swayze? burt reynolds and steve mcqueen i assume?

[a500lbgorilla]

dane cook is funny. He has much better delivery on the jokes he steals than the people who came up with them.

It does take mad skills to watch some one and say to yourself, "Well shit, if I constantly walk around on stage like a motivational speaker while I deliver that joke, I'll make millions!! Plus people are so unaware that when they here these disgruntled old farts complaining about my stealing jokes, all my young adoring fans will think 'da jus hatin rock on dane cook!'"

and yet at the same time, comedy is an art.

If cook would just find himself a team of comedy writers and throw together a nightly show, he'd do very well.

Louis CK (for example) has the art of throwing a joke together down, Dane (who steals from the aforementioned) has the art of throwing a joke at you down. Why deify one aspect and shun the other? They both take their own form of brilliance.

edit: I loved dane cooks first album and since then ive liked him less and less. But he still shows you that CK's material in the right mouth can be laugh out loud, roll off your chair hilarious. While CK couldn't really deliver a joke that would get me going more than my standard "haha" response. Dane can bring the fire, CK can supply the coal is all im getting at. 1 man comedy is hard to master. Jon Stewart and Conan O'Brien have writers, why not Dane?

I would agree whole-heartedly with your assessment, if the Dane Cook album came with a writing credit on it for Louis CK I'd like him just fine.... as is... pretty douchey.

lol how sick would that be? "Ya, i stole your jokes. And I'm riiiich. Atleast I gave you credit, sucker."

[sinister1]

A friend of mine who never met a movie he did not like and/or quote regularly said Torque and The Terminators are the worst ever.

+1 for The Happening & Max Payne (another friend said he walked out on both).

My gf says Gigli is unwatchable (but who didn't know that?)

[a500lbgorilla]

holy crap, Torque. That movie was such trash.

[BennyLaRue]

dude u r gay. awesomely gay.

selleck? swayze? burt reynolds and steve mcqueen i assume?

WRONG DECADE, FOO.

[miniboss]

The happening

jesus...

[bigspenda73]

land of the lost

will ferrell should have stopped years ago

[BennyLaRue]

The Spirit