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Made love to a mentally-handicapped girl at lunch...

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  1. #1

    Default Made love to a mentally-handicapped girl at lunch...

    I was sitting at a local bistro, enjoying my spinach & goat cheese quiche, when I noticed a mother with her mentally challenged daughter sitting at an adjacent table, eying me. I smiled politely a few times, and after the mother finished her meal, she approached me. She explained how ever since she told her daughter about sex, it's all that's been on her mind. She talks about it obsessively, and wants more than anything to experience it.

    The daughter was in her mid-20s, in a wheel chair for life, so she had very thin legs relative to her somewhat thicker upper body (huge gunners). She had that 'mentally challenged look' on her face, lip somewhat dragging, allowing for the occasional stream of drool, but overall -- somewhat attractive.

    We went back to their house, the daughter displaying bursts of excitement that were only amplified when we were left alone in her room. I took things very slowly (perhaps TOO slow for her), and she was highly receptive at every stage. As she finished, she released what can only be described as a viking war cry, which pushed me over the top.

    We briefly discussed our favorite color of play-dough, before I looked at my watch and indicated that I had to get back to work. As I left the house, her mother politely thanked me, and I was gone.

    Kind of a surreal experience, but seriously -- who's gunna turn down a lunch shag
  2. #2

    Default Re: Made love to a mentally-handicapped girl at lunch...

    Quote Originally Posted by d0zer
    I was sitting at a local bistro, enjoying my spinach & goat cheese quiche ...
    I already don't believe you.
  3. #3
    fwiw, the aforementioned quiche is quite delicious
  4. #4
    kinda odd :/
  5. #5
    bigred's Avatar
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    wtf
    LOL OPERATIONS
  6. #6
    I'm sitting here trying to figure out what the line is on if this is real or not. I'm thinking 3/2 against. But I'm terrible at setting lines.

    I'll start it at 3/2 and open it up to the free market.
  7. #7
    oskar's Avatar
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    That's a good story.
    The strengh of a hero is defined by the weakness of his villains.
  8. #8
    flomo's Avatar
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    i'm in the mood to masterbate now.
  9. #9
    ^5
    You-- yes, you-- you're a cunt.
  10. #10
    Cool story bro. Made my morning
    Congratulations, you've won your dick's weight in sweets! Decode the message in the above post to find out how to claim your tic-tac
  11. #11
    XTR1000's Avatar
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    Cool story to tell your grandchildren one day
    Quote Originally Posted by bigred View Post
    xtr stand for exotic tranny retards
    yo
  12. #12
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    nh if true
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  13. #13
    I know I'm posting again but seriously this has made my morning. Cool story well told imo

    'bursts of excitement' and 'viking war cry' made me rofl
    Congratulations, you've won your dick's weight in sweets! Decode the message in the above post to find out how to claim your tic-tac
  14. #14
    a500lbgorilla's Avatar
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    himself fucker.
    Please be true
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  15. #15
    [11:11] <+bikes> bitches love your face
  16. #16

    Default Re: Made love to a mentally-handicapped girl at lunch...

    would have been funnier if you'd gone in the room with her so the mum thinks you're doing it, then written "Retard" on her forehead in permament marker. Had a quick wank and left.
    Normski
  17. #17
    frosst's Avatar
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    pics of retard for applause or shunning

  18. #18
    Was the Mom hot?
  19. #19
    Also, haha at you eating at a bistro alone, Daven.
  20. #20

    Default Re: Made love to a mentally-handicapped girl at lunch...

    Quote Originally Posted by d0zer
    She had that 'mentally challenged look' on her face, lip somewhat dragging, allowing for the occasional stream of drool, but overall -- somewhat attractive.
    hawt.

    There is no mention of terts anywhere in this, so obviously fake.
    So you click their picture and then you get their money?
  21. #21
    c'mon you'd have to at least make a deal w the mommy to get some milf lovin'... you fail
  22. #22
    Quote Originally Posted by givememyleg
    c'mon you'd have to at least make a deal w the mommy to get some milf lovin'... you fail
    EXACTLY!!!!
    Poker is easy, it's winning at poker that's hard.
  23. #23
    100% false. Was waiting to get prince rolled
  24. #24
    Quote Originally Posted by wufwugy
    100% false. Was waiting to get prince rolled
    Would you call shakespeare "false"?

    *sigh*
  25. #25
    Montague or it didn't happen
  26. #26
    You sorry sacks of shit can't see the forest through the trees.

    It doesn't matter whether or not this happened -- it's a beautiful lighthearted story about romance, love, coming of age, play-dough, and the beauty of the human experience.
  27. #27
    oskar's Avatar
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    You are quite the artist.
    And Don Juan of the mentally handicapped.
  28. #28

    Default Re: Made love to a mentally-handicapped girl at lunch...

    Quote Originally Posted by d0zer
    ...(huge gunners)...
    poetry
  29. #29

    Default Re: Made love to a mentally-handicapped girl at lunch...

    Quote Originally Posted by kingnat
    Quote Originally Posted by d0zer
    She had that 'mentally challenged look' on her face, lip somewhat dragging, allowing for the occasional stream of drool, but overall -- somewhat attractive.
    hawt.

    There is no mention of terts anywhere in this, so obviously fake.
    Quote Originally Posted by Warpe
    Quote Originally Posted by d0zer
    ...(huge gunners)...
    poetry
  30. #30
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    How old was her mom? She was probably laughing her ass off after you went into the room with her daughter
  31. #31
    bode's Avatar
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    one of my friends had a few of us believing a very similar story but it had to do with a girl in a wheel chair and a fence post.
    eeevees are not monies yet...they are like baby monies.
  32. #32
    Check your logs d0zer, I actually said in IRC that it doesn't matter if it's true of not.
    Congratulations, you've won your dick's weight in sweets! Decode the message in the above post to find out how to claim your tic-tac
  33. #33
    You had me at play doh.
    NH, WP, GG, TY, Etc..........................
  34. #34
    swiggidy's Avatar
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    If it was true it would have been told via MSpaint, not prose. So in a sense it's more beautiful this way?
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